Page 2 of The Goode Girls of Maple Lane
CAMERON:According to the straight A’s I got in bio classes...
HANNAH:Whatever. It still sounds dirty
CAMERON:There’s a bush joke in here somewhere but I’m too tired to find it
HANNAH:Long day?
CAMERON:Long week. Long month. Long year
I take a hefty swig of cider and feel my body start to relax.
HANNAH:Still having second thoughts about vet school?
CAMERON:Try third or fourth or a thousand and fiftieth
HANNAH:But you’ll be SUCH an amazing vet
CAMERON:I don’t know. The grind is getting to me. And being a vet is so much more about dealing with people than I thought it would be back when I was bandaging teddy bear legs and diagnosing the family cats with catatonia and cataracts
HANNAH:You just made me spit-take my Gatorade
CAMERON:How many miles this morning?
HANNAH:Only ten. I’ll do a long run this weekend
Only ten, I think as I prod the raw spot where my blister popped. I can’t even imagine.
HANNAH:Maybe you should shake things up? Ask Plant Guy on a date
CAMERON:Pretty sure I’m not his type
HANNAH:Green?
CAMERON:Fun
Hannah sends me an angry face emoji. I reply with a shrug emoji. This is a long-standing argument and I appreciate her perennially generous view of my personality, but I know myself. I’m not exactly the life of the party. I rarely even attend “the party.”
CAMERON:Also, pretty sure PG’s habit of sneaking large houseplants into his apartment in the middle of the night is a major red flag. Don’t you think it’s a little weird?
HANNAH:It’s the greenest of green flags. And I thought you liked weird
CAMERON:I like
I stop there and delete the text, unable to complete it. It’s probably not a good sign that I can’t identify what I like, let alone rally the energy to pursue it, but I know this much. I don’t have room in my life for dating. I barely have room for a daily shower.
CAMERON:I’m not sure my tween crush on the goth, blue-haired skater boy who worked at Tasteez soft serve should be considered indicative of my adult dating taste
HANNAH:Hey, if you have a type...
CAMERON:I promise if Plant Guy ever dyes his hair a primary color, gets a ton of piercings, rolls in on a skateboard, and muddles my ice cream order, I’ll at least ask his name
HANNAH:Aww. It’s practically wedding bells
CAMERON:You’re funny. Enjoy your run
HANNAH:Enjoy your sleep
With a grossly indulgent sigh at the vast disparity between the life I used to imagine I’d be living by now and the one I’m actually living, I set aside my phone and kick my tired feet up on my ugly, thrifted coffee table, settling back into my less ugly, thrifted pillows and finishing my cider at an alarming rate, one I try not to read too much into.
