Page 28 of Healing You
She sped back down the hill, through the sleepy lakeside neighborhoods, Ruckus leading the way, loving every second. But after closing in on another two miles, she stole a peek behind her in an attempt to catch a glimpse of whether or not Steve was following her. Only instead of finding Steve, her eyes fell to Gatsby, lagging behind, panting, ears back. She gasped, slowing to a walk and bent down to nuzzle into his scruff. “Oh, buddy... I'm so sorry,” she murmured into his fur. Standing, she walked across the street to where a little strip of dirt led to the lakeside. She unclipped both dogs leashes and let them go cool off. Gatsby made it to the edge, wading into the shallow end where he could still stand, panting. What exactly was she running from, anyway? A kiss? A freaking kiss?
“Stupid,” she grumbled under her breath. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.”
“Hey now.” Steve's breathless voice came up behind her, and even though her heart startled, her body remained still. “Gatsby is very smart. I'm sure he doesn't appreciate being called stupid.”
She didn't quite want to admit it to herself, but relief rushed through her body as she turned to find him standing there, covered in sweat and he gave her a lazy, trouble-loaded smile. “I should thank you,” he said. “For pushing me into a seven and a half minute mile.”
It was natural for her to run from him. To avoid him. His chest heaved with each deep breath, and he unclipped Molly's leash just in time for her to leap into the lake with the others. “I didn't think I'd catch up to you,” he said.
“Yeah. I was pushing Gatsby too hard.” She swallowed the lump forming in her throat. “He needed a break.”
“Probably a good idea.” He looked out toward the lake, seemingly avoiding her gaze. “I don't mind walking them home for you if you prefer to run. To be alone.”
Breaking away from the hypnotizing glitter of the setting sun on the lake, her gaze collided with his blue stare. “Thanks, but I'm fine. You should go ahead and go home.”
His shoulder brushed against hers, and a burst of heat flashed low in her belly at his touch. Yvonne let out a cautious, slow breath, making sure it was silent and unable to be heard beneath Steve's own breathing, which was beginning to slow back to normal.
He lifted a brow. “I think I need the rest time as much as Gatsby does.”
A creaky pain split into her elbow and back and Yvonne stretched toward the sky. “It's gonna rain tonight.”
“Yeah?” Steve's eyes widened.
“Yeah.”
They watched the dogs play in the water for several more minutes before Steve finally broke the silence. “Can I ask you something?”
The tone in his voice caused her muscles to seize. “Sure.”
“Something personal?”
Uh-oh. “Sure.” This time she stretched the word out by a few extra syllables.
“Why did you and Jonah break up? What went wrong?”
Everything. “Why?”
He seemed to consider her question for a second before answering. “Because I'm curious.” When she slid him a side-eyed glance, he laughed. “Okay, and maybe a little nosy.” Then, swaying, he gave her a light bump with his elbow. “And maybe I want to take notes so that if I'm ever lucky enough to get a second chance with you, I don't blow it.”
Flutters ruptured in her belly, and a burst of excitement popped off in her chest as he said that. “He smothered me,” she said. “When we first started dating, it's what I thought I wanted—what I needed. Someone who was seemingly so secure that they'd never leave or hurt me. It's what I thought a loving, happy relationship was. But we weren't happy. And we weren't loving. He was over-bearing, much in the same way my parents were. If there was a problem, he threw lavish gifts and money at it rather than just talking to me.” She heard Steve's sharp breath from beside her. “I don't think Jonah's an evil guy. It was just too much for me. When I asked him to back off and give me space, it only made him want to hold on tighter.”
They were quiet a while longer, watching the dogs swim.
“What are the chances we can each forgive and let go of the past?”
A sharp pain like a searing hot poker stabbed into her heart with his question. Maybe it was because his voice was so calm, or his eyes so genuine, but for the first time in over a decade, Yvonne found herself wanting to forgive and forget as opposed to clutching onto the anger. She wanted to forgive as much as she wanted to be forgiven. But it was the letting go part she had the most trouble with. Trusting him once more to be with her and stick around if and when things got tough.
His brows shot up so far that they vanished beneath his sweat saturated hairline. She turned to face him dead-on, the moisture in the air almost as thick as the tension between them. Before she could answer, he continued. “Because I so desperately want to ask you on a date, but unless I know that you can eventually forgive me for the past, it feels futile.” His gaze swept over her so slowly that it made her legs quiver.
“I don't know,” she answered honestly. “I would like to be able to forgive you. But I don't make promises unless I'm sure I can keep them.” You'll never know if you can swim until you let go of the dock and try.
“Well,” he said, taking a step forward. “Will you tell me when you do know?” She nodded and he took yet another step, closing in on the remaining space between them. “If I kiss you again, are you going to go running away from me?” His voice caused a shiver to rock through her. His arms snaked around her waist, urging her against him, and she obliged, likewise rolling her hips and pulsing against his tightening erection. Heat slid through to the tips of her fingers, her body greedy for his.
“I promise not to run away,” she said.
He cupped her jaw and brushed across her bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. Pushing her fingers into his silky hair, she pulled in a shaky breath and lifted onto her toes to cover his mouth with hers. Heat radiated off his body, and his scent was mouthwatering and sensuous. His arms coiled tighter around her waist, possessively, and his teeth scraped against her lips before he stroked his tongue inside against hers.
Gatsby slid his wet body against their legs and shook, spraying lake water all over them. Yvonne squealed.
