Page 101 of Don't Bet On It
Realizing I meant it was startling, but I doubled down. “We’re trying to figure things out. That’s where we’re at.”
“I believe you and Ronan will have no trouble figuring things out. You seem to be kindred souls.”
“How could you possibly know that?”
“Trauma might seem different, but sometimes it’s not different at all. He had an overbearing father. I managed to suss out everything I needed to know about his relationship with Norbert in the brief time I watched them across the lounge that day.”
I was interested despite myself. “His father is mean.”
Candy chuckled. “That’s an interesting word choice.”
“He doesn’t respect Ronan’s choices. Ronan doesn’t want to run the Hawthorne. He wants to be an artist.”
“And so do you.”
“So do I what?”
“Want to be an artist.”
“I … love art.” I chose my words carefully. This was a surprisingly difficult conversation to have. “I was raised to believe that there was no chance of making a living with art, however, and I took it to heart. It’s just a hobby.”
“Your mother told you there was no future in art?”
“My mother told me a lot of things.”
“I would like to know what those things are.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re closer to a breakthrough than you seem to understand. You just need a little push. I’ve been determined not to push you because I don’t think you do well under pressure. You came to me today, however. I’ve decided to change things up.”
“Maybe I don’t want to talk to you about this.” I crossed my arms over my chest. Even though I knew it was a defiant position, I couldn’t help myself.
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.” It could’ve been lip service—it felt a little like lip service—but she was sincere. I could read it in her eyes.
On an exasperated sigh, I relaxed my position. “Why do you care?”
“It’s my job to care.”
“Right.”
“That being said,” she continued, “I find you intriguing. You’ve overcome a great deal. You can be more than you ever dreamed of. You have to get over this final hump before that’s possible, though.”
She made me want to confide in her. Nobody since Robin had ever managed that. Before I realized what I was going to do, I was talking. “She was a terrible mother. I know you’ve read my file. That’s not even all of it. She was only caught leaving me alone a few times when I had no business being left alone. She left me way more than that.”
“I figured.”
“You might think I hate her because of all of this—and in some ways I do—but I’m also grateful for her.”
I thought Candy would gasp and be stunned by my admission. She wasn’t. “She taught you to be a survivor,” she supplied.
“She did, and I’ve managed to survive completely on my own for the entirety of my life.”
“You chose to be a loner.”
“It worked for me for a time.” My eyes moved to the lone office window. “Somehow—and I’m going to wonder how for a long time—things shifted for me. I’m no longer happy being alone.”
“You mean Ronan shifted things for you.”
