Page 155 of Misrule
“’Law say herlike a big, strong man tree.” He ignored their collective gasps. “Don’t that mean Aunt KenDallcoulda pick up Uncle Knox and bring him inside?”
“No, of course not!” Meggie said in annoyance. “Kendall is as delicate as the rest of the women.”
CJ grinned at her. “Mommie beat that bitch ass!” he said with glee. “’Law say that. Him talk about it a lot.”
“Let’s see to Uncle Knox,” Meggie ordered on a sniff. “Later, you, me and Daddy are sitting down and talking.”
“Mama, what happened?” Bailey asked as CJ turned to Meggie, buried his face against her stomach and sniffled. “When you called, the only thing I got from you was that Lucas was going to kill Knox.”
“I want to be dead,” Knox whined. “If I can’t have Roxanne, I don’t want to live. Outlaw is an ignorant idiot and I fucking hate that you drive around in that ugly purple Navigator, but I don’t care. If you want a stupid asshole in our family, I don’t care.”
“Shut up, mudna fucka!” CJ yelled, struggling to get out of Meggie’s hold. “’Lawnotstupid. ‘Law smart!” He strained, grunting in his efforts. “Let me go, Mommie! Ima make this mudna fucka bleed.”
“Oh, shut up, Baby Thug,” Knox slurred. “You’re lucky Roxanne loves you, or I’d take a belt to your little ass.”
“You think?” Meggie glared at the back of Knox’s head. “You touch my son and I’ll take a belt toyou.”
“Somebody needs to get control of that fucking kid and it isn’t you, Blondie.”
“Knox, that’s enough!” Roxy demanded. “You can’t want my fucking ass if you’re still being an insulting motherfucker.”
“Roxanne?” Knox breathed, attempting to stand. Between the alcohol and the hits, he fell flat on his ass each time he tried to get to his feet. “I love you. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean anything I said. I’m just so frustrated and that’s the way I handle it.”
He wasn’t sober or coherent enough for an in-depth conversation, but she needed to get through to him, so he’d stay out of the meatshack.
Roxy knelt in front of him and took his hand. Though he looked haggard and drawn, in her eyes, he was still beautiful. She brought his hand to her face and rubbed her cheek against his palm, her eyes filling with tears again. “Knox,” she whispered, gliding her fingers through his silky hair. “I didn’t question why you proposed to me. I just thought it was because you loved me. That’s what I wanted to believe. I saw no problem with Mortician separating us until after the wedding because…” Her voice trailed off. They’d had this conversation too many times.
He got to his knees. If she hadn’t grabbed him and wrapped her arms around his waist, he would’ve toppled over again.
“The truth is you never wanted to marry me.” Her voice caught.
“Oh, Mama,” Bailey said again.
Knox pulled Roxy closer. “Roxanne, please believe me.Please. I do want to marry you.Please. Take my ring back.”
The ring. Right. She’d felt it was bad luck from the moment he’d put it on her finger.
“Please. I’ll give you my fortune. I’ll do anything you ask of me.”
“Knox, there are some things you just don’t recover from,” she told him. “And the things you said to me…Hurt.”
Knox bowed down and wrapped his arms around her thighs. “Please, baby. Please. Forgive me. I tried to drink the horrible words away. I tried to drink away the memory of you giving me my ring back. I tried to drink away my loneliness. I don’t even know how I got home. I might’ve walked. But I don’t care!” He tightened his hold on her. “Please!”
“Knox,stop! You’re embarrassing yourself.”
“I embarrassed you. I deserve to have the same happen to me.”
Roxy tugged at his shoulder. “What happens when you get frustrated again? I’m not going to live my life listening to your putdowns and insults because you’re fucking frustrated. I’m not going to live my life wondering if you married me because you really loved me or because you were afraid to die.”
Getting to his knees again, he took her face between his hands. “You don’t want us to end. I can see it. I know you’ve been crying. I know how you look after Duke hurts you.”
Roxy yanked her face away and guided him to a sitting position and then stood. “You also know what he says to crush my soul. It was unworthy of you to imply the same things. He sees me as garbage, and so do you.”
Knox laid on the ground. “That isn’t true. I see you as a beautiful, smart, witty, strong woman. Just tell me what I have to do?”
“Nothing,” she reiterated. “What can you do? We have nothing in common, even though I tried to believe otherwise. These boys are all tatted up. They wear leather. They ride Harleys. They—”
“Theyhave nothing to do withus, Roxanne,” he interrupted, sounding so pathetic Roxy almost felt sorry for him.
