Page 78 of Misrule
“I ain’t have the motherfuckers switched, assfuck.”
“Okay, your sac reversal.”
“It’s a fuckin’ dick snip flip, so shut the fuck up and let me fuckin’ sleep.”
Christopher didn’t sleep, though. He thought of Megan. She was with him all the time—in his heart and his head. Except when he had to fuck a motherfucker up. He wouldn’t mar her goodness with that gruesomeness, even in his mind. She was his sweet angel and he’d do whatever the fuck he needed to do to keep his woman safe, including going through a dick snip flip. He hadn’t told her or asked her feelings about the situation. Megan loved little motherfuckers, so she wouldn’t have a problem with Christopher wanting her pregnant again.
How-fuckin-ever, he’d made such a fucking commotion about getting the dick snip in the first place. She’d been disappointed but already pregnant. Since then, they hadn’t discussed it.
Her current unreasonableness left him no choice but the low-motherfucker-move that currently had him and his cock in such misery. He’d feel her out before he told her what he’d done. Would she be his sweet angel or hell bitch again? Based on prior interactions, she’d welcome another pregnancy. She’d worked hard, though, to get her body back after all the babies. She hadn’t had much weight to lose. It was more of toning herself up. She was proud of the rewards her efforts achieved.
Christopher couldn’t help but wonder if her firmer body meant something deeper? Or was she doing it because she’d been resigned to the fact that she wouldn’t ever get pregnant again?
She knew how much he worried about her when she was knocked up. She stuck close to home and, if she did go out, she allowed the bikers Christopher assigned to her to go with her.
Of fucking course, he couldn’t keep her knocked up. It was too fucking easy for him and Megan to make babies. At the rate they’d been going, they’d end up with enough kids to start their own country.
Right now, though, he needed her either under guard, with him, or at home. Just until…untilwhat? He sure as fuck would never forget she’d been stolen from him. Maybe, during her next pregnancy, it would register with her that he only wanted her safe. All the motherfuckers assigned to her detail loved it. She was young, gorgeous, and upbeat.Shewas the one who thought fuckheads were bored.Theydidn’t. Assfucks fought to be on her detail. Some of them, like Johnnie and Val, wouldneverget that privilege.
Christopher’s foresight helped them to keep their dicks attached to their bodies and their heads on their shoulders.
“Fuck,” Mort grumbled.
Christopher opened his eyes. Bumper-to-bumper traffic, heavier than usual, greeted him. He sighed. Whatever was causing this snarl on the 205, it would take them hours to get home, when all he wanted to do was get past Megan and get in bed.
Tension rose in him. The longer he took to face his wife, the more nervous he’d become. He’d never get any shut eye in his current state, so he pulled his seat up.
“If I ain’t been so scared of losin’ Megan she woulda been pushin’ another kid out soon.”
Mort drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. “You saying you don’t fear she’ll die in childbirth anymore?”
“Yeah, Mort, Ima always be fuckin’ scared of that shit,” Christopher said quietly. “But I’m more scared a motherfucker takin’ her from me, and Megan ain’t listenin’. She ain’t wantin’ another detail cuz she so happy bein’ free to do her own shit. It’s fuckin’ killin’ me she fuckin’ agreed to a fuckin’ detail for my fuckin’ sake. How unhappy she gonna be with that? She like me-fuckin-time. She bein’ a stubborn lil motherfucker. Un-fuckin-reasonable as a motherfucker. I gotta do something to keep her home.”
“We got her back.”
“She was fuckin’dyin’ in that fuckin’ hole, Mortician. If we wouldna found her when we did, I woulda…” He would’ve climbed down the stairs that led to the underground room, and found her corpse, just like in his nightmares. “I just come too close to losin’ her too many times. Megan my sun and my moon. I ain’t know what else to do but torturin’ my cock.”
His balls felt as if they’d swelled to twice their normal size. He needed ice dumped on his dick. He needed to lay down in their bedroom, without a stitch of clothes, legs open, to cool his nuts.
“Prez, I think you a little delirious talking about suns and moons, but I feel what you’re saying. You and Meggie share a love for the ages, brother. It’s a special connection.”
Christopher’s eyes drooped closed before he opened them again. “She my heart and soul,” he whispered. “If I ever lose her, I lose me. My sanity. My life. I love Megan from the top of her head to the bottom of her feet. I just love her, Mort. She gotta be safe. Ain’t nothin’ happened to her in her other pregnancies, so I think my way the right way.”
“You know her, Outlaw. If you think this will keep her inside, then you right.”
Two hours later, Mortician shook Christopher awake as he pulled up in front of Christopher’s house, the place Megan made a home.
“Let me help you to the door.”
“Fuck no,” Christopher barked. “Cameras every-fuckin-where. If Megan see you helpin’ me, she gonna know shit ain’t right.”
“You been snoring for ninety fucking minutes. You sure you can make it?”
In response, Christopher opened the door and got out of the Escalade. Pain streaked through him, and he moaned.
“Prez?”
“Bye, Mort!”
