Page 173 of Relentles
“Are you jealous?”
“Yes! If that was your plan, you won.”
Her plan had been to devastate CJ, not infuriate him. “You’re jealous of me? When I have acne and I’m not pretty anymore?”
“You aren’t pretty, Harley,” CJ agreed, crushing her soul. “You’re fucking gorgeous. I have never seen a more beautiful girl.”
“Ariana called me a nappy-headed ho.”
He stiffened. “I’ll talk to Diesel. He paid those two off. Ariana and Erin,” he said, as if she needed clarification. “Well, their parents since they are minors. I’ll tell him to make sure they don’t return to Ridge Moore.”
“You’d do that for me?”
“I’d die for you, Harley.”
The words sent a chill through her, despite how much she appreciated the sentiment. Maybe, because Uncle Christopher shot Uncle Johnnie and burned Uncle Digger, and Mommie wanted Daddy to patch out. “CJ, I promise to do better. Just give me another chance.Please. If Molly comes back, I’ll welcome her and trust you. The past few weeks have been horrendous.”
Since school opened in September, actually. That was when he was assigned Molly as a lab partner.
“Harley—”
“Please, CJ. We can start over and be best friends like we used to. Don’t you want to forget all the bad stuff?”
“Yeah, bae,” he said on a sigh. “I do.”
“Then what do you say to my idea?”
At his silence, fear reeled inside her. Before he spoke, she saw his regret and knew his answer.
Shaking his head, he shrugged. “Let’s take it a day at a time. I don’t know if we can ever be as close as we once were. We will always have our childhood memories.”
“CJ, please—”
He raised a hand and halted her words. “Don’t, Harls. It isn’t any use. You hurt me a lot. I can forgive you. Idoforgive you.”
“Then show me,” she rushed out. “I want to go steady with you. I want to be your best friend.Please.”
“No.”
A sob escaped her. “You just said you’d die for me. Literally, like two minutes ago.”
“I would, Harley. I would give my life if it meant saving yours. I would do the same for Rebel, Mattie, and Jo. But I’m not your fucking puppet and I’m not a fuckingElf on the Shelf. You can’t push and pull me away at your whim, nor can you throw me aside and blame me for all the wrongs in your fucking life because you refuse to believe me. Let me reiterate in case I wasn’t clear at first.I’m going to join the club as soon as I can. It’s a lot. I know that, yet you of all people should know the importance of having an understanding partner. Girls are a part of club life. I’m not going to deal with your bullshit if you walk in and find me surrounded by women. It’s understandable you won’t like it. Mom hates it. Aunt Bailey. Aunt Zoann. Aunt Bunny. Yet, they understand the necessity.”
Covering her face with her hands, she wept in bitter heartache. Believing CJ was cheating couldn’t compare to losing him completely.
Arms wrapped around her, and Harley collapsed against his chest.
“I’m so sorry, CJ! I’m so, so sorry. Please, forgive me. Please!” Hysteria threatened to overtake her.
He pulled her onto his lap and kissed her forehead. “Shhhhhh. It’s okay, Harley. Truly. I forgive you. I said I’d try to be your friend again and—”
She raised her head. “Try? What does that mean?” she wailed.
“It means if you hand me bullshit again, we’ll be acquaintances and nothing more from that day to the end of eternity.”
“What? No! That isn’t fair!”
“Not to you. For me, it’s extremely fucking fair. You act like you have fucking sense and believe me when I tell you something or I’m truly done.”
