Page 31 of Relentles
Yet, Johnnie’s ugly words played on repeat in her head. She couldn’t escape them. She couldn’t cry them away, scream them away, punch them away, or shower them away.
“Can you even fuck him? He’s unhappy. It wouldn’t surprise me if he turned to another woman. Remember Kiera?Youdidn’t change him, Megan.Hechanged himself. But you’re old and used up now. He needs a younger, more vibrant woman. My guess is if he hasn’t already found her, he soon will.”
A small sob escaped Meggie.
She couldn’t fuck Christopher, but she could suck him. Shewantedto suck him because she hadn’t had any part of him since Thanksgiving morning.
And, maybe, shehadn’tchanged him, but hehadchanged. Didn’t that idiot know if he hadn’t transformed himself not only for her but because he wanted to, it wouldn’t have lasted?
What was wrong with Johnnie?
Meggie swiped at her tears. Johnnie? What was wrong withJohnnie? No, what was wrong withher?
She met her watery glaze, reflected back at her in the mirror, then studied her face. She didn’t look—orfeel—old and used up. She didn’t have any wrinkles or even gray hair.
Kiera came to mind again. She’d had her own apartment and her own income. Everything Meggie had was because of Christopher.
Her family defined her. No, her husband, and her adoration of him, defined her. Her life revolved around him, their kids, family, and club members.
But was that so terrible?
As a child, Meggie dreamed of being a mom and a homemaker. Dinah, her mother, deemed the goal pathetic and grounded Meggie for an entire weekend. By the time she returned to school that Monday, she’d decided she would become a meteorologist.
Her life turned out exactly how she dreamed.
Did that make her old, used up, and boring?
Before she answered that question,Anytime You Need a Friendby Mariah Carey suddenly blasted.
Meggie didn’t hesitate to answer, clicking the speakerphone icon immediately. “Hey, Kendall.”
“Outlaw sent Brooks to the meatshack,” Kendall announced, her voice thick with tears.
“What?” Meggie gasped, swiping at her own tears, the news like a bucket of cold water over her doubt and despair. “I’ll call you back—”
“He’s here with me. Diesel called me and…Johnnie hasn’t come home yet, and he won’t answer his telephone.”
Fear seized Meggie, and her heart rate skyrocketed. She sucked in a sobby breath. “Let me call Christopher—”
“Why are you crying, Meggie?” Kendall asked, her voice trembling. “Is Johnnie already dead?”
“No, Kendall. Not as far as I know. I…let me call you back once I find out what’s going on?”
Kendall was silent for a moment. “You sound so sad. What’s the matter?”
“Let me call you—”
“Hold on a moment. Rory’s calling.”
In the seconds it took for Kendall to switch between the calls, Meggie considered hanging up and calling her husband, but Kendall was back before she decided.
“Johnnie’s at the club,” she said. “Rory’s staying with him. Outlaw shot him.”
In front of the kids?
“I-I can’t leave Brooks. I gave him a sedative with a shot of bourbon.”
Meggie sighed. “If you want to go to the club to check on Johnnie, I can come to your house in case Brooks awakens.”
