Page 60 of Two Guys One Puck
Wolfe reaches for a white poster board, but Archangel waves him off. “Visuals are helpful!”
“It’s a little over the top,” Archangel says, sitting next to Wolfe. It makes them look like disapproving parents.
It would be funny if I wasn’t annoyed.
“How long has this been going on?” Wolfe asks.
“It’s not really going on. It’s happened a couple of times.”
“So you’ve fucked him more than once?!” Wolfe seems shocked.
“More or less.”
“When was the first?” he presses.
I’m not sure if giving them the details is going to help or hurt, but fuck it. “After the game when we got into that big fight.”
“How the fuck?” Archangel’s southern accent comes out in full force when he’s surprised.
“I don’t know.” I end up just telling them the story because I know they are going to drag it out of me.
They’re just staring when I finish.
“This has been going on eight fucking months, and you didn’t tell your best friends?” Archangel is clearly still hurt, and maybe I deserve that.
“It’s not really an easy topic to broach. He is the enemy, as you’ve both pointed out, and it’s… You know.” I drop my voice, not able to say it.
“It’s not that big of a deal.” Archangel crosses his arms.
“For you. It is for me. If I don’t get drafted, I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do when my dad dies. We can barely payour bills as it is. My aunt helps as much as she can, but we are sinking,” I snap because Archangel’s never had to worry about money a day in his life.
“They aren’t going to not draft you because you’re gay,” Archangel scoffs. “Not in this day and age.”
“I’m glad you’re comfortable being out, but that’s just not the case. There are still lots of older homophobes who don’t want to play with anyone gay.”
Archangel opens his mouth to reply, but Wolfe cuts him off.
“He’s right. If they already trust you and shit, you’re fine to come out, but it drastically lowers his prospects. It’s not just the players either. The league is littered with homophobes. He’ll have a much easier time if he’s acting straight.”
Archangel rolls his eyes but doesn’t argue. I’m sure it hasn’t been easy for him to be one of the only very openly gay guys in college hockey, but he did choose that. His life differs from mine. We aren’t playing with the same rules because he doesn’t need the money.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you two. I should have, but it’s been a mind fuck.” I push to my feet. “Can I go?”
“No.” Wolfe says before I can leave. “This isn’t about your sexuality. We’ll put a pin in that part. This is about you and your mental health.”
“What about my mental health?” I ask.
“You’re clearly having a breakdown of some sort.”
“Huh?”
“Why else would you be sleeping with the enemy if you weren’t having a midlife crisis?”
“I’m twenty-one.”
Wolfe ignores me and goes on. “Increasingly dangerous seeking behavior is also a sign of bipolar disorder and suicidal ideation. This is serious.”
“For fuck’s sake. It’s not that deep.” Maybe I do need to learn from Ktytor. But I want to smack myself for thinking that.
