Page 61 of Exes That Puck
I blink back tears and watch Ava. She really stopped crying the second she found out that her brother is the same type of person she just broke up with.
And I’m left trying to figure out if I should listen to them or my heart.
23
I watch the Uber’s taillights disappear around the corner, my sister and Kara inside, probably talking about what a piece of shit I am. The worst part? They’re right.
Everything Ava said hits like body checks I should’ve seen coming. Controlling. Jealous. Making Kara miserable. And here I am, still expecting her to come back, still expecting her to forgive me because that’s what she always does.
There’s this arrogant part of me that wants to say fuck it. Kara keeps coming back, so maybe I’m not that bad. Maybe she likes the drama, the intensity. Maybe she loves who I really am. But I know that’s bullshit. I know that’s why she broke up with me in the first place. Even if it’s the reason she was attracted to me, it’s now the reason she’s not my girl. And that’s playing games with my head.
Dylan and Westley emerge from their rooms like they’ve been waiting for the coast to clear.
“That was brutal,” Dylan says.
Westley nods. “I heard what your sister said. You okay?”
I shake my head. “It’s bullshit. I’m just trying to help my sister, you know? But she’s got a strong personality and there’s no convincing her otherwise.”
“You good?” Dylan asks, studying my face.
“No, man. I’m not. I need to fucking move my body or do something.”
I grab my gym bag and head for the door before I can do something stupid like text Kara or drive to her dorm. The campus gym is nearly empty, just a few dedicated lifters and someone running on the treadmill.
I keep checking my phone between sets, but there’s nothing from Ava or Kara. No updates on how much my sister hates me or whether Kara’s finally done with my shit.
Halfway through my workout, I remember the therapy homework I need to do whenever I’m triggered. I pull out my phone and open the notes app, typing quickly.
Trigger: Sister calling me an asshole, telling Kara she deserves better
Physical response: Chest tight, wanted to punch something
What I did: Nothing but went to gym
Better than stopping them from leaving or staying home and making this feeling grow. Definitely better than calling Kara or Ava right now.
I load the bench press heavy and push through three sets until my arms shake. Then I hit the treadmill, cranking the speed until I’m sprinting full out. My lungs burn and my legs scream, but it’s better than the noise in my head.
Ten minutes in, Dylan appears on the treadmill next to mine. He doesn’t say anything, just matches my pace. We run in silence,and the acknowledgment that he’s here means more than I can put into words.
When we’re walking out, towels draped around our necks, I finally speak.
“I’m trying to change, but I don’t know if it’s going to stick.”
Dylan considers this then he nods. “The effort matters. And if it doesn’t work with Kara, it’ll be better in your next relationship.”
Next relationship.
The words hit like ice water. I don’t want a next relationship. I don’t want anyone else. The thought of being with someone who isn’t Kara makes my stomach turn.
“I don’t want anyone else,” I say quietly.
Dylan nods like he gets it, and we don’t talk the rest of the way home.
Back in my room, I stare at my phone for twenty minutes before saying fuck it and text Kara.
Zeke:Sneak out tonight to come see me?
