Page 90 of Forbidden Puck
“What a whirlwind,” I said with a sigh as we sped down the highway. “These past few days went by so fast.” I gave a long, tired yawn. “Andjeez,I'm drained from all the drama.”
“I'll say. Feels like I aged 5 years this weekend.”
“In a good way or bad way?”
He looked at me like I was nuts. “There's agoodway to age?”
“Yes,” I said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I looked at Ryan and tried to imagine this rugged, handsome man, five years older and entering his 30's. I started to run my hands through his hair, methodically looking for gray hairs.
Ryan caught on to what I was doing. “Hey, what the hell? Are you looking for gray hairs?”
I giggled. “Yeah, I am.”
“You find any?” he asked nervously.
“Unfortunately, not yet …”
“Unfortunately?!”
“You'd looksohot in salt-and-pepper, Ryan. You'd look all distinguished but macho, too. And you score double points if you're still super jacked.”
He tutted. “Huh. Well … if you say so.”
“Oh! Hey! Found one!” I cheered and pinched my fingers shut on the lone gray hair.
“No you didn't,” he said gravely.
“I'm not a liar.” I plucked it and showed it to him.
Ryan took his eyes off the road to inspect it. “I'll be damned. You really think that hair turned gray because of this weekend?”
“No, that's silly. But I do think we both grew up a lot this weekend.”
He nodded. “I definitely did.”
We drove on for miles, my hand in his. My head was spinning—from today, and last night, and hell the whole weekend, really, and also the things I was going back home to …
Eventually, Ryan noticed I was in my own world.
“What's on your mind?” he asked.
“God, whatisn'ton my mind?”
“Tell me everything.”
“I was just thinking about us … this weekend … work … how I'm not at all excited to go back to New York … and how nervous I am.”
“Nervous about what?” he asked.
I sighed. “Don't get me wrong. I'msohappy thatthings worked out, Ryan. But … now it feels like there's all thispressurefor things to work out between us. You know?”
He shook his head. “I don't feel any pressure.”
“What if you end up not liking me?”
He chuckled. “Not happening.”
But I began to spiral downwards.“Really? What makes you so sure? What if, the second you put me on that plane, the reality of everything we did suddenly hits you? Everything we said, everything you went through with Lance and the team andeverything else,dawns on you in the darkest of ways. And you start saying to yourself,” I puffed my chest up and did my best gruff Radar voice, “'what the hell was I thinking? I almost nuked my career over a girl I'm barely going to be able to see. Plus, why should I settle down? Wherever I go, girls wanna bang me, because my name's Radar, and—'”
