Page 51 of Good Vibes Only
“Oh hush! I’m an old soul, okay? And tease me about my age all you want, but remember, I’mstillyounger than you,” she said, turning up her nose. “Anyway. So I had this blog. It was anonymous and no one really read it, so I truly felt comfortable writing whatever I wanted.”
“CanIread it?”
“Oh my God! Noway!” she said. “It’s mega cringe. I can’t even bear to look at it today. All my old posts are just me whining about fuckboys likeyou”—she bumped me with her shoulder—“because I didn’t know any better.”
“Still not a fuckboy.”
“Still don’t believe you, but we’re not doing this again,” she said, snuffing that debate out with a wink and a pretty smile. “Anyway.So um. During my freshman year, my friend and I were sitting around the dorms, bored out of our minds on the weekend. We were trying to think of something fun to do when she randomly decided we should go poke around a sex shop.”
“Ahem. Don’t you mean ‘adult boutique?’”
She giggled. “Oh no. This was definitely a ‘sex shop.’ Because they can’tallbe classy places like Good Vibes Only.”
I grinned. I liked her cockiness. “Alright, alright. I respect it.”
“Truth be told, I wasn’t wild about going to the sex shop. I don’t know why; I just thought it’d be weird and grimy and full of pervs. But my friend seemed really into it, so whatever, I agreed and we went. What’s strange is that she wassogung-ho about dragging me out there, but once we actually walked inside? Well, she started acting super awkward and shy and was afraid to look at or touch anything. She looked like she couldn’twaitto get out of there ASAP. Which was kinda funny because I found out I wasn’t creeped out at all—in fact, I was super curious about all the toys, and wanted to buy something. I think that day was my sexual awakening. Anyway, I ended up buying my very first vibrator there. I was so excited to rush home and use it. As soon as we got back to the dorms, I made up some lousy excuse to go back to my room.” She laughed. “Shetotallyknew what I was up to, too, but she didn’t call me out.”
“Not gonna lie, that’s hot.” I chuckled, strangely turned on. “Tell me about your first vibrator.”
She giggled. “Oh, it was nothing special. Just your standard bullet vibe. The motor wasn’t very strong at all; it only took one AA battery. I think I paid ten bucks for it. But I’d never used a vibrator before, sowow—that little thing opened up a whole new world. It was like seeing in color for the very first time. I could actuallyorgasmnow.”
“Wait, you’d never had an orgasm until then?” I asked, a little shocked.
“No, no, I’d had a few. But I had to really be in the mood to get to that point—and they weren’t anywhere near as strong. If an orgasm is the peak of pleasure, then this was the difference between standing on some measly hill in your backyard versus standing at the summit of a mountain.”
“Okay, interesting. The analogy helps.” I liked how she could talk about sex so openly without it being weird. It made me smile. “So that’s when you knew you wanted to open an adult boutique?”
“Ha! Not yet! It took years before I even considered the idea.”
“So what happened?”
“Well, like I said, I was comfortable writing whatever I wanted on my LiveJournal, because it was anonymous and nobody knew about it. So, um …” She hesitated, her voice lowering. “So I sorta wrote a review about my new vibrator and posted it on my LJ.”
I laughed. I was dying to read what she had to say—It struck me as super cute and kinda hot. “Oh, now Ihaveto read this blog.”
“Absolutely not! And not because I’m embarrassed about the content.”
“Then what are you embarrassed about?”
“My atrocious writing. I was so bad back then. I’ve gotten a lot better in the years since. If you really want, you can read mynewtoy reviews on the Good Vibes Only website.”
“So you still do toy reviews?” I had to shift in my stool because, suddenly, there was a lot less room in my pants. “Whoa. I’ve got the weirdest boner ever right now.”
“Oh my God.Brett.” She laughed and rest her head against my shoulder, a gentle weight that warmed my heart. “Yes, I still do reviews. And see, that’s actually how I got my entire start in this crazy career.”
I cocked my head with interest. “How so?”
“When I wrote that review on my first vibrator, I included a link to where people could buy it, just in case anyone wanted to try it out for themselves.”
“I thought you said no one read your blog?”
“They didn’t! I basically never had any comments on any of my entries. No one cared about my boring life or boy troubles,” she said, laughing. “But for some reason, people found that vibrator review and they shared it with their friends. Apparently, people even used my link to buy their own toy.”
I chuckled. “Damn. I thought you said this toy was nothing special. What the hell were you telling people it would do? Blow your mind? Give you a cigarette afterward?”
“Noo! I only told the truth! That it was my first and I really, really liked it.” I loved to make her laugh; she looked so pretty, her face beaming and her body shaking with delight. “Anyway, eventually the toy company noticed that they were getting traffic from my blog, so they sent me some of their other toys, so I could review those, too.”
“They sent ’em to you for free?”
