Page 8 of Sam
We sit quietly for a minute or so. Eventually, Mum asks, “What’s keeping you up tonight? Other than the usual?”
Hesitating a little before I reply, “I need to look for a job.”
Mum tilts her head down to look at me in surprise. Holding my hand up, I say, “I know I’m working at the office with you, but I need a job of my own. I have to start claiming back my independence. He’s taken a lot from me, and I need to take my life back. My therapist agrees. I’m never going to feel safe if I keep hiding behind my family. And Mum… that’s what I’m doing. I’m hiding.”
Mum is quiet as she listens. I take a sip of my tea before continuing, “I have to start somewhere. I’ve sent Carly all my medical details, including what the physio recommended. She’s going to work on a regimen to get me fit again. I need to take control of my life, or he wins, and I’m damned if I’m letting him win,” I whisper the last part.
Mum brushes her hand over my head in comfort, pressing her lips to my temple. “I understand, baby, more than you might think. Your dad, on the other hand, may have a hard time coming around.”
“Yeah,” I sigh, “he can’t keep me wrapped up and protected at home forever, though. And deep down he knows that.”
“He does,” Mum agrees. “Finding you like that broke something in him. We need to be patient. He’ll get there eventually. This may be a good thing for everyone.”
I’d known my mum would understand where I was coming from. “I may have a solution,” she continues.
Sitting up, I turn to look at her. “Yeah?”
She nods, “Yes. Abby called me today to ask if I knew of anyone that she and Sam could hire as an office manager. You have the qualifications, and you’ve worked for me since you were sixteen, so you have the experience. It would make your dad feel better because you’d be protected and with people that he knows. What do you think?”
A smile blooms over my face and a feeling flows through me that is so foreign it takes me a while to realise what it is. Excitement! It’s been so long since I’d felt anything except pain and anger that it took me by surprise.
“I say yes. Will you call Abby, or should I?”
Mum laughs at my enthusiasm. “I say we let Abby sleep because it’s the middle of the night, and I’ll call her tomorrow.”
“Okay,” I agree even as disappointment floods me, but Mum is right, it is the middle of the night. A yawn takes me by surprise.
“Ready to get some sleep?” Mum wants to know.
“Yeah,” I agree, slowly standing up. I take our now empty mugs to the kitchen and rinse them out before putting them in the dishwasher. We’d run it in the morning after breakfast.
Walking towards where Mum waits for me, I follow her down the passage to my room. Getting into bed, I take the goodnight kiss and get tucked into bed like I had when I was a child with no complaints. It was a comfort to both me and Mum. Closing my eyes, I drift off with a smile. My sleep is only marred once with nightmares. I’ll take that as a win.
CHAPTER 5
ABBY
My gaze drifts over to Sam’s side of our shared office, and I shake my head at the paper piled up on his desk. I’m proud of the man my son has become, even if my mama's heart hurts for him.
You think that when your children are grown, you’ll worry about them less. It’s a lie. When they are little, you can heal all hurts and keep them safe and happy.
The hurts they get as adults are not something a mum can kiss and make better. This last year has been a doozy for two of my children, and I’ve hurt for both of them.
Thank the Lord that Alec and Bren have sorted their shit out. Both Bev and I had long conversations about those two over the last few months, and we’re now both breathing a sigh of relief. With Bren squared away, I turned my attention to Sam.
My boy has a big heart, and it has been broken not once but twice this year. Once by Alec. But the biggest hurt was by Bella. None of us know what had happened. They’d seemed to be going in the right direction until they weren’t, and Alec had Sam on a plane and whisked him away, while Bella had disappeared from everyone’s lives.
It has left a hole in all our lives, and it isn’t a hole that we know how to fill back up. Draco, Onyx, and Dog were going spare, trying to find out what was happening with Bella. Maggie hasaged so much in the last year with worry. I hope that whatever it is that’s keeping her away from home is worth it. I’ve wanted to slap her silly for what she’s done to Sam, but I’ve always thought that they weren’t suited. If they had been, then they’d have been together long before now. Sometimes you have to sit back and let things run their course, no matter how much you want to interfere.
Reaper and I, as parents, always allowed our kids to handle their own problems unless they sought our advice and help. They know we’re here to support them in any way when they need us to. Maybe that’s the wrong approach, especially after the last year.
Heaving a sigh, I turn back to my own work. There’s not much I can do to heal his heart, but I can find us an office manager. My phone rings, jumping around on my desk because I’d silenced it and put it on vibrate when I was on a business call this morning.
The interruption breaks my contemplation of the ad I’d been working on and yanks me from my thoughts. I wasn’t happy with the advertisement, but I’d put it off long enough. I’d get it loaded onto job sites tonight and see what popped up.
Not looking to see who’s calling, I distractedly answer, “Abby speaking, how may I help?”
“Hey, Abs, it’s me, no need for formalities,” Tilly chuckles.
