Page 75 of Dismantle & Prevail
I may not be an expert at relationships, but I know for certain that you have to go through the darkest of days to see if you can be there for each other on the brightest of days.
Ari isn’t even giving me a chance to prove that I can be that person.
Punch.
Tears fill my eyes and I swipe them away with my glove, mad that I am letting my emotions get the best of me.
Punch.
Last fall, I was in this same room, punching this same bag, crying over the same man. Only this time, it's not because he is gone, it's because I know I am falling in love with this man and he doesn’t trust me.
Punch.
Punch.
“Ugh!!!” A guttural cry escapes me and I swipe away the tears once more.
Fuck being vulnerable. Fuck letting my walls down. Fuck the idea of letting myself fall so deeply and allowing myself to finally live.
If this is what love is supposed to feel like, I don’t want any part of it.
Is it nice having a friend to go to daily just to not sit in silence? Yes.
Is it nice to have someone to act as your dreamcatcher when your past creeps up? Yes.
Is it nice to have your entire body lit on fire because of a hot, tattooed president of a club that saves people from the pits of hell? Fuck yes.
Is it nice having a person you can trust with your entire heart that no matter how dark your mind becomes, they will see the bright side in you? Yes, but not when they don’t allow you to return the favor.
Tears fall in rapid succession down my face, clouding my vision, but I don’t stop.
Punch.Wipe tears.Punch.Wipe tears.Punch.
Suddenly, my hand slips and I’m immediately hit with deja vu.
No. Not again.
I wait for the pain to hit me, but it doesn’t.
What the hell? When did I close my eyes?
My eyes flutter open and I swipe away a tear, jumping back when my gaze zeros in on the sight in front of me.
Ari stands in front of me, his back against the punching bag. His eyes are shining with sympathy and hurt as his hand moves to rub his chest.
“Damn, Hellhound. Forgot how much power you have behind your punch.”
Taking a step back, I turn around facing the opposite wall, not wanting anything to do with him in this moment.
I feel him against my back, and I take another step forward.
“Please let me explain, Taylor. I’m so sorry.”
Spinning back around, I stare up at him. “Sorry you got caught saying I would not be involved or sorry you don’t trust me,” I say, malice dripping from my voice.
Ari gestures to the couch on the opposite side of the room, and because my mind is emotionally fried at the moment, I follow him like a damn lost puppy.
He pats the seat next to him and I sit down, leaving space between us.
