Page 96 of Only in Our Dream
Unless the unpredictability involved her ex-husband stepping out of the elevator beside a woman on a stretcher, clearly in labor. He didn’t see Melanie; he was too focused on the woman beside him. Vera must have noticed too because she stopped in her tracks at the same time Melanie did.She put her hand out in front of Melanie as if to protect her.
“Was that…?”
“Rob.” Melanie’s throat felt it was closing in. She looked at Vera, panicking. “Did you know?”
“Mel, no.” Vera shook her head, putting her hands on Melanie’s shoulders to steady her. “All I knew was the patient’s name and Janet Sullivan didn’t mean anything to me until right now.”
Janet Sullivan.
So they got marriedandshe took his name. He must love that.
Not once since the divorce did Melanie wonder if Rob and Janet had gotten married. Whatever Rob decided to do with his life was up to him. She wished him no hard feelings; she’d wanted to be the bigger person in the divorce, after all.
But knowing he apparently married Janetandknocked her up within the nine months since their divorce was enough to make Melanie spiral.
All the years of trying to have a baby with Rob came flooding back to her. They’d done so many tests to determine why Melanie couldn’t have a baby. After one round of testing, Rob had told her it was his fault. That his numbers weren’t where they should be. Melanie had tried not to harbor any ill feelings against him; it wasn’t his fault.
However, seeing Rob with a pregnant Janet made Melanie wonder if he was just telling her it was his fault, so they wouldstop trying. Which was exactly what they had done. They’d started fostering after that and eventually, the idea of having their own baby faded into the background of life.
Was it always me? Did the tests miss something wrong with me? Or did he just not want to have a baby withme?
Her head was spinning so fast that she felt she was going to pass out. She tried to do the math in her head. It was May, so that means Janet would have gotten pregnant in August. Did Rob know she was pregnant when he asked for the divorce? Or was the baby the result of him celebrating the fact Melanie had agreed to a divorce?
“Mel? Talk to me.” Vera helped her sit in a nearby chair as she knelt in front of her. “You’re white as a ghost.”
She heard Vera ask someone for water as Vera placed her cool hand on her forehead. Vera pushed two fingers firmly into Melanie’s wrist as she checked her pulse. Melanie squeezed her eyes tightly, begging the room to stop spinning.
“Was it me?”
“What?” Vera rubbed her arm sweetly.
“Was I the reason we couldn’t have a baby?”
“Oh, Mel.” Even through the slightly still spinning room, Melanie could see Vera’s face soften as she realized what Melanie was asking. “None of it was your fault, honey.”
“He’s having a baby with her,” Melanie sobbed as Vera embraced her tightly.
Through her tears, Melanie heard Vera ask someone to page Stacey. Stacey Jameson was another OBGYN at the hospital. She worked days alongside Vera, although Melanie knew she was currently seeing patients at the office.
“And page Dr. West to my office, please.” Vera’s voice was firm as she rattled off the instructions to a nurse Melanie couldn’t recognize through her tears. Helping Melanie up, Vera led her back to her office. They sat on the couch slowly. Melanierested her head on Vera’s shoulder as her friend held her tight. She kissed the top of Melanie’s head tenderly. “It’s okay.”
“Why am I like this?”
“What?”
Melanie sat up so she could see Vera’s face. Tenderly, Vera wiped the tears from Melanie’s eyes as she spoke.
“I’m so happy with Cam. I love her so much and I’m so blessed to be loved by her. So why am I upset that my ex-husband impregnated his newwife?”
“Because Rob was a huge part of your life for over twodecades, Mel. I’m not a psychologist, but I feel your feelings are completely valid right now. You and Rob wanted a baby for years. You’re allowed to feel whatever you’re feeling.”
Melanie’s mind traveled back to the last time Vera had told her almost the exact same thing. They were in the same hospital just a few doors down from where they currently sat. Another round of IVF had been unsuccessful and they were out of embryos from their last cycle to try again. She’d gone to Vera crying, asking if there was anything she could do to help her have a baby.
Which, at the time, there wasn’t. Vera had started training with the IVF procedures because of Melanie’s journey and struggles. But she wasn’t able to help her yet. Not like Melanie knew she would be able to now if they were in the same position.
Even years later, Melanie still remembered the pain of each negative pregnancy test. She remembered the three pregnancies she’d lost before she ever made it to six weeks. What she couldn’t remember was how Rob had comforted her during those times. Because, even back then, it had been Cameron and Vera who had been by her side in her darkest days.
“Why didn’t he tell me?”
