Page 52 of Resistance
‘I’m not coming, Konstantin, you need to go quickly, comrade.’
With a look of surprise, he stepped forward and tried to take her arm, but Yvette stood firm while he reasoned with her.
‘Yvette, Zaya, you must. Do not be afraid, it is only a short crossing and we have come this far, we will be fine, trust me.’
The commando on the boat told them to move it, Yvette ignored him. ‘I’m not afraid but I’m not ready to go yet. Please, Konstantin, try to understand. Good luck and take care, comrade.’
Another order from the boat and she saw that Konstantin was battling with his conscience but maybe the set of her jaw, or the steel in her bones that would not be moved when he tried to pull her, told him he had lost.
‘Where will you go? You must not go back to your village; it is too dangerous.’
‘I won’t. Go now, please, or they will leave without you.’
It was with a nod of the head that he told her he understood, respected her decision and then he turned and ran through the waves. The engine fired, nobody waved, Yvette kept her trembling hands in her pockets. Florian remained by her side and they watched as the mist swallowed the boat whole. Within seconds they were gone.
Once they’d climbed and descended the dunes, reaching the road, breathless, they paused and listened. There were patrols all along the coast and if they’d been alerted to the presence of a boat then soon the area would be swarming, they had to move fast.
Florian took the lead. ‘Come, we will keep going until dawn then rest, we have a few hours before it is light. We can go to the house of my cousin, he is in Finistere but it’s a good walk south. Are you okay, Yvette? You should have gone with them; you have done enough here.’
‘You go, Florian. It will be safer alone. I want to stay here.’
‘No, I will not leave you, Yvette. Vincent would never forgive me. Now come, stop being so stubborn it is sending me mad.’
At this Yvette managed a smile. ‘Then you will go mad here, on this road because I am staying. Please, Florian, head south and be safe. You too have done plenty and I don’t want you to be captured with me. Alone you have a chance.’
Florian patted his jacket pockets and looked angry when he remembered he had no cigarettes. ‘Pah, why are you women so stubborn?’
‘And why do men need to be told three times before they do as they are told? Please go, Florian… I cannot bear another goodbye so hurry, your cousin will have plenty of cigarettes, I am sure.’ She smiled, willing him to go.
Another exasperated sound left Florian’s lips and then he reached out and pulled her to him, kissing each cheek and then letting go. ‘Good luck, Yvette, I am proud to have known you and maybe after the war you will come back, this is your home now too.’
Yvette only had time to answer quickly, there was a sound somewhere in the distance, a vehicle. ‘You too, Florian, I will never forget you.Vive la France,vive la Resistance.’
The sound grew louder and after one last look they parted, taking different directions. Yvette darted into the field then ran along the road, throwing herself behind a hedgerow, where Florian went, she had no idea. She lay like that, huddled beneath her coat, legs tucked inside, head covered with her arms as the German jeep rolled by and once it passed, she remained where she was until morning knowing that once it was light she could begin her wait, for Vincent.
29
Alone
Châteaubriant, 2005
Maude sniffed and wiped the tears that leaked and coursed down her cheeks while her gran fetched tissues from the bathroom. Darkness had fallen while Dottie told her tale uninterrupted, one that came out in a torrent of memories, faces, places, anger, love and hurt.
‘Oh, Gran, that’s so sad. It hurts my heart to think of you all alone like that. How long did you stay there, at the beach?’
Dottie came over to the bed and handed Maude a fist full of toilet paper, sitting beside her, then giving her a hug while she wiped her eyes and nose. She thought for a moment, gathering all the thoughts that after all these years demanded attention after being squashed into a box, the lid closed.
‘You know I really can’t be completely certain, days definitely. I found the beacon Vincent mentioned the next morning and hid in the dunes, watching and waiting for him. I remember feeling numb, even when I said goodbye to Konstantin and the others, even Florian. Something inside me had died, like a light switch being flicked off. I drank water from the trough on the lane, I ate nothing so maybe it was hunger that forced me to move on, or some part of my addled brain accepted that Vincent was really dead.’
‘Where did you go? I can’t believe you were on your own and stranded in the middle of occupied France.’ Maude leant her head on Dottie’s shoulder.
Dottie took Maude’s hand as she spoke. ‘I headed for St Malo, and don’t forget, it was my choice to stay. I was selfish really because I should have thought about my parents and gone home but I couldn’t. It was like I was stuck.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘It was as though I couldn’t leave it all behind, France, the Resistance, my friends, Tante Helene and even the dead body I pictured on the floor of a barn. I wasn’t ready and…’ Dottie fell into silence.
As if sensing something, Maude lifted her head and pulled away from her gran but kept hold of her hand. ‘What?’
