Page 63 of A Good Mother
Babs looked outraged. ‘Well he can’t say a single bad thing about you, Robin, because as far as I’m concerned you’re perfect and he’s bloody lucky to have you. We all are, isn’t that right, Gina?’
Gina nodded.
Babs was on a roll. ‘And not all men are bad. Our Gina’s Jimmy is a good lad, so we can’t lump him in the bastard category with the vicar and my Pete who’s bloody useless as far as I’m concerned.’
Babs was looking to Gina for affirmation and met by silence. A big lump of something was stuck in her throat, and in her head, all her worries, fears and confusion were pushing their way to the front like a great big ball of fire, burning a hole in her brain, making her eyes sting.
Babs had noticed and still holding on to Robin’s hand, spread her arm sidewards and took Gina’s hand in hers. ‘Love, what’s the matter? You’ve gone a funny colour. I’ve not upset you, have I?’
Gina gripped the handle of her mug, and Babs’ hand and before she even had time to think about the words she’d kept trapped inside for so long, blurted them out. She couldn’t bear to keep them in a second longer.
‘No, you’ve not, but Jimmy has.’
Babs looked from Gina to Robin then back to Gina. ‘Why, what has he done?’
‘Well, for a start he’s not the “good lad” you think he is. He’s having an affair too!’
Two gasps filled the room and beating Babs to it, Robin spoke first. ‘Oh, Gina. Surely not. What on earth makes you think that?’
Gina was losing control. All the months of evidence gathering. The nights she’d spent talking herself in and out of her suspicions were swelling up inside her and about to burst forth from her throat.
The anger and humiliation, the disappointment and bewilderment needed to get out and be heard because otherwise she would go mad. When the tears came, they were followed by the scraping of chairs and arms around her shoulder.
Then once she’d been patted and shushed, had drank a full glass of water and used three sheets of kitchen roll, Gina was finally able to explain about Jimmy.
CHAPTERTHIRTY-EIGHT
BABS
Babs was lostfor words and that was a rarity. Never would she have thought that Jimmy would be up to no good, it was inconceivable. But with that Bella Young. Well that had knocked the wind right out of her. He’d lost the plot, he must have. Jeopardising his marriage and family for that stuck-up floozy. Bella had always been a horrible child who’d grown into a horrible woman.
And no matter how much they’d dissembled all the evidence that Gina laid before them, as much as Babs didn’t want to admit it, it looked like Jimmy had joined The Bastard Squad. He’d be in good company with Edmund, Nate, and Pete.
It had been awkward enough earlier; hearing Robin describe Edmund as having an impeccable reputation. It’d made her cringe but how could she expose him without shaming Gina? The last thing the poor love needed was to hear that her own mum had been at it with the vicar all those years ago. And Robin needed it even less.
Babs bloody hated secrets but for the sake of her two dearest friends she would keep the one about Edmund, for the time being. She quite liked having that little nugget in her pocket, just in case. The matter most urgent was what to do about Jimmy.
‘I think you need to confront him, Gina. And I know you’re scared that if it comes out in the open he’ll leave, but you can’t go on like this. It’s clearly making you ill and there still could be a reasonable explanation. So I think it’s worth giving him a chance.’
Babs poured herself a glass of Prosecco, telling herself she needed it and didn’t care how merry it made her. The evening was going rapidly downhill, and she’d not even got round to telling them that she was going to leave Pete! That could wait.
Robin leant forward, her fingers spinning the base of the half-full wine glass. ‘I agree with Babs. This is clearly making you ill and you have to think of your own health, as well as protecting the children. I do understand though, what you’re doing. I’m guilty of the same and I’m sure Babs is too.’
Gina looked up, her eyes swollen and her gaunt face blotchy and red. ‘What do you mean?’
A sigh, then Robin explained. ‘Keeping the peace. That’s what I mean, maintaining the status quo so that the children don’t get upset. And because you think the situation you’re in is better than any you can imagine alone. I’ve made all the excuses, told myself I was doing it so Willow and Cris could live in a childhood bubble of bliss. I made sure arguments were kept from little ears. That they never heard me cry and thought the smile I painted on at breakfast was real. I know you’re scared of what the future holds if the balloon goes up, but is living a half-life fair on you or, ultimately Max and Mimi?’
Robin turned to Babs who took the baton. ‘She’s right. I’ve done it for years with my lot. I’ve plodded on, kept the peace, agreed to things I shouldn’t have, put my three first, like it was my goal in life. And if I’m honest, put Pete after them but when it comes down to it. I always came last.’
Gina sounded shocked. ‘But that’s what mums do! We put our kids first and that’s what I’m doing now. I want to keep the family together for them, so they don’t live the life I had. I’ll never be like Debbie because she was the most selfish woman on this earth. I just can’t accept it, let him go. I have to find a way to keep him, for them.’
Babs’ heart was hurting for her friend, because while she was trying to get it right, she was getting it so wrong. It was hard to explain. Then she had an idea. ‘Look, Gina. I’ve known you since you were a little girl and love you like family which is why I can be honest. I know all about your mum, and how you strive to be the total opposite of her in every way, but you have to stop because it’s blurring your judgement and affecting how you live your life.’
Gina’s hand went to her chest, her expression one of confusion. ‘What do you mean?’
‘You know when I slag Pete off and complain about the kids, and I do, a lot. You brush it aside. It’s just Babs going on with herself. The thing is, my family, my life, my marriage might not be something you should aspire to. I’m certainly not perfect and recently I’ve had to face up to the mistakes I’ve made and one of them, you’re making right now.’
‘Like what?’
