CHAPTER TWELVE
GRACE
ONE MONTH LATER:
Ismile as I wake to the now-habitual feeling of Jarron wrapped around me. It's been this way every single day since the first time I spent the night, and I’ve not only come to expect the habit but I’ve also come to crave it. Since that very first day of fishing, it feels like we haven’t hit stop.
We spent the whole day at the pond. I caught four big catfish, and Jarron caught two. Then again, it seemed like he spent more time staring at me than casting his reel. That night we had a fish fry, and I swear it brought me back to my childhood. The happiest memories from my childhood were when my mom could hide the fact that we were homeless and broke with magical stories of sleeping under the stars and endless summers of swimming in our own personal pool in the backyard.
Ever since that first day, I swear he’s been finding new ways each day to make me smile. One was a bike ride across the state. My butt hurt by the time we made it home, but it was the most magical experience of my life. Being able to see the world in clearview, with no windows or glass blocking the beauty of the world. We did so many things that after a couple of weeks, I had to call uncle. I was tired and just wanted to sit on the front porch and relax.
Jarron used that time to fix up the house. I helped here and there, but with a lot of the things he had left to do, he was worried I might get hurt. Instead, I sat in a rocker, with Finick at my feet, Jarron close by, and my knitting needles in my hand. That’s how my Finicky girl and I came out with matching knitted outfits and headbands. And yes, she loves hers as well. She brings me her outfit of choice each day. Jarron grumbles about her club vest, but I see the smile on his face when he catches us both matching.
Even with all the amazing adventures and endless projects, there is nothing like waking up in the safety of his arms. In such a short time, it feels like I’ve grown so much emotionally. The worry is still there—what if he gets tired of being domesticated? Because that’s exactly what this feels like — domestication. What if he just asks me to leave one day?
“I can hear you thinking from here, my Star. You're safe with me,” he whispers in a sexy, raspy morning voice. “I won't ever let you go.”
I tear up at how well he already knows me. I hate that sometimes, okay, maybe more often than not, I need constant reassurance. I worry all the time he’s going to get tired of having to tell me he’s not going anywhere. I mean, that has to be annoying, right? The person you love above all else, not trusting you fully? But it's not that I don’t trust Jarron. I trust him more than I trust anyone else on this planet. The past just doesn’t want to let go of the hold it has on me, and I can’t help but feel defeated by that.
“I know about the past, Star. Still struggle with it severely. Well, not so much since you’ve come into my life.” I smile at thatas he squeezes my middle. “You’re my saving grace, baby. How could I ever let go of my salvation?”
With that, I turn over so I’m facing him, and I can’t hold back anymore. I plant my mouth hard on his. I feel him jerk back and for a second, oh no, I’ve done this wrong. Shoot, shoot, shoot, just when I think about giving away my virginity, I’m rejected.
“Fuccckkkkkk…” I hear him groan just before his mouth is on mine and he’s devouring me.
“Oh!” I gasp as he explodes. With every movement, it’s like he’s everywhere all at once. He lights up every nerve ending like a glow-in-the-dark neon paint show; I swear I’m bursting with colors. It feels like his fingers are imprinting on my skin as he squeezes me through, then pulls my leg up over his hip. He holds back for only a second, then groans again before grinding hard onto my center. We’ve had make-out sessions, but anytime it gets too intense, he pulls back and heads to the bathroom. I’m not letting him leave today.
Reaching under the covers, I feel the top elastic of his boxer shorts. It’s been torture sleeping next to all this drool-worthy golden skin, and now I don’t want to take my hands away. Or my tongue, I think as I lick from the top of his peck up to just under his throat, then, because I can’t help myself, I bite down there.
“Mother fucker! Baby, that feels fucking amazing,” he moans once again, grinding against me. This time, though, I’ve pulled my panties to the side, and just as he grinds down, I pull down his boxers and feel his dick pop out. The next thing I feel is his skin on mine, and I swear my eyes nearly roll out of my head.
“Fuck fuck fuck Star. Shit, baby, you better be ready for this. I swear I don’t want to rush you, but this is my breaking point.”
“Break, Jaron, please break,” I beg, gasping and moaning as I feel the head of his cock run through my swollen, wet lips.
“Fuck baby, I need to get you ready, let me eat that beautiful pussy,” he says, pulling away, but I can’t take it right now.
“Next time, please, please, please don’t leave me right now,” I beg, needing this one-on-one, face-to-face connection right now. He’ll be my first, and I need him to anchor me. I can see he’s fighting with himself, but as he swipes his finger through my pussy and his finger comes back soaked, it’s now his turn to roll his eyes all the way to the back.
“Shit, you are wet. Fuck baby, alright, we’re still going to take it slow,” he tells me sternly. When I give him a nod in agreement, he lifts up just a bit. I’m about to ask him where he’s going, but he slides my underwear down and completely off, followed by his, and lastly my shirt.
He doesn’t give me time to feel self-conscious, and knowing that he’s doing that for me—that he knows me enough to know where my head is at—makes me even more sure, even more eager, and open about this… about him. Instead of cowering or covering up my body like I know I usually would be dying to do. I lay in front of him, feeling sexier and sexier with each groan he makes, each pass of his eyes over my curves, each hungry look, and lick of those lips. I feel sexier than I ever have before, sexy enough to be bold.
Boldly grabbing his cock with my small hand, I stroke it a few times, causing his head to fall back and a moan to leave his throat. One more stroke, and then I pull him forward, all the way to where he is finally lined up with my entrance. I feel like I’ve waited for this, for him, my whole life, and I want that life to start yesterday.
As he realizes it’s no longer my hand covering his cock head, instead it's my wet center, he groans and pushes forward on instinct. I give a small squeak, but moan as well as he slides in just an inch. Shoot, he’s so much bigger than I expected. I try hard to keep the whimper inside, but I must not be successful because I feel Jarron stop and go stock still. I open my eyes, and he’s staring at me with pain.
“I’m hurting you. I shouldn't have…” I stop him by planting my mouth on his, not wanting to hear him say he shouldn't be with me. Instead, I plant my heels behind him and pull as hard as I can. The impact of him fully sliding into me steals my breath away. It's not quite painful, just an uncomfortable fullness I can feel ebbing with each passing second. Still, his groans ring through my ears, and the pure pleasure in that one sound has it disappearing faster than it came.
“Fuck, baby, you shouldn't have done that. I don't want to hurt you,” he says, bending and biting my earlobe. I moan at the tinge of pain, thrusting my hips further up to meet his.
“Oh!” bursts out of me as he hits deep, deep inside, and my stomach clenches. That feels so nice, I can't help but close my eyes and moan. Slower this time, he does it again, and again it feels like the stars are aligning and colliding — almost magical, and for the longest time, I’m suspended in pleasure. Between this world and the next, just the two of us, a galaxy all our own.
“Yes, Star, fuck, squeeze me so tight,” he says, moving faster and faster. I’m so caught up in the pleasure, I don't realize my nails are scoring his back, even if the pain seems to drive him harder and harder. In the next second, he twists his hips. The angle even deeper, ever harder, even more pleasurable.
So pleasurable that I can't hold this pressure inside. The dam bursts, the stars falling, shining, spinning around me in a burst of color and magic so strong and potent that I feel Jarron let go as well.
For the first time ever… I’m safe, guarded, loved, and completely at peace.