Page 14 of Anyone But Me
Jax’s excitement and bubbly energy was contagious, and I found myself feeling uncharacteristically excited as well. Not necessarily about singing karaoke in front of a bunch of people, but about completing this list. Something about knowing that Jax was willing to be by my side for this made it even more exciting, which was weird since it wasn’t like we were super close.
Thinking about Jax’s involvement in this made a question pop into my head. “Why are you doing this for me? You don’t even know me that well.”
Jax shrugged. I expected her answer to be something about doing this because of her relationship with my sister, but what she said surprised me. “Maybe I want to get to know you better, and this list seems like the perfect way to do that.”
“Is there anything I can do for you in return? Any big changes you want to make in your life?” I asked with a laugh.
Jax’s eyes widened, and her mouth fell open slightly. “You know what? There actually is. You know a lot about dating, right?”
I laughed again. “I wouldn’t exactly saya lot. I’ve dated one person my entire life.”
“That’s still one more person than I’ve seriously dated, plus you two were together forever, right?”
There was a stab of pain to my heart from that reminder. “Most of high school and all of college.”
“That’s definitely forever when you’re that young.Plus, you read romance books, so you probably have a ton of extra insight just from that.”
“And what does my knowledge of dating have to do with you?” I honestly had no idea where she was going with this.
Jax sighed, and for the first time, she actually looked defeated. “I’m twenty-eight, and I’ve never had a serious girlfriend. Olivia was my one ally in the non-dating world, but even she’s betrothed now.”
Betrothed technically meant engaged, but I had enough social grace to realize not to point that out when Jax was opening up to me. “So, is that what you want? A serious girlfriend?”
Jax nodded a bunch of times and with each nod, her face lit up even more. “What ifIhave a list of ten things to accomplish to prepare myself for theseriousdating world that I can do while you accomplish your ten?”
“Okay.” There was no way I was going to say no with how excited Jax looked at that moment. “How can I help?”
“What are some important things to do when dating someone to show them you're serious and keep them around long term?”
She really shouldn’t be asking me how to keep someone around when the girl I planned to spend my whole life with dumped me for being too boring and pretty much told me sheregretted the years she spent with me. I wasn’t going to tell her that though. Jax wanted my help, and I was going to give it to her. At least, to the best of my ability. “I mean, before any of that, you need to figure outwhoit is you want to date. You’ll make fun of me for saying this, but I think you should make a list of qualities that are important to you in a significant other.”
Jax jumped off of the couch and ran across the room, opening a drawer in the kitchen area that was filled with junk. She pulled out a piece of paper that appeared to have a grocery list on it, grabbed a plate from the cupboard, then sat down on the couch, turned the paper over onto the blank side, and sat it on the plate. She then wrote:1. List of qualities.
Once she was done writing, she looked up at me with wide eyes. “That was a good one. What else?”
I thought it through before speaking again. “You need to meet someone in a way that tells them you’re not just looking for a hookup, like hanging out somewhere that’s not a bar or making a dating profile that specifically states you want something long term.”
Jax nodded and quickly addedHang out places where you can meet someone (NOTA BAR)andMake a dating profile forACTUALdatingto her list.
“And what do I need to do once I get a cool girl? How do I keep her?” Jax stared at me like a student waiting for the answers to a test.
I thought about how to answer. There was so much to relationships, I didn’t know where to start. They required work, and I had to assume that work became even harder when it was an adult relationship. “Being in a relationship is about having a teammate in life. It’s about being vulnerable, getting through the big and small moments together. Dating and grand romantic gestures are important, but even more important are the little things—random acts of kindness, being so comfortable witheach other that you can sit in silence doing nothing at all, taking big steps together that might seem small to other people, like meeting each other’s families.”
Jax looked toward the ceiling and moved her lips as if she was rehashing to herself what I had just said to her. She then moved her eyes down to her paper and wrote like crazy. After a few minutes, she proudly held the paper toward me so I could read what she added.
4. Practice being vulnerable
5. Practice random acts of kindness to get ideas for my future hot ass girlfriend
6. Sit in silence?
7. Dates?
8. Mock meeting of parental units
I chuckled when I read through the list. “Maybe instead of sitting in silence, we could spend a few hours sitting next to each other and reading. I always felt that true comfort is to be able to sit with someone else and both quietly read.”I also can’t believe I just said that out loud.
“That’s beautiful,” Jax said, her words so soft I could tell she actually meant them. “I’m definitely changing it to that. Sounds like a great time. Maybe we could fulfill that one the same time we do your relaxing weekend.”
