Page 350 of Alchemised
He would have hurt her less if he’d reached in and ripped her heart out.
“You gave your word,” he said, when she refused to reply, his voice hardening.
“No—” Her voice broke.
His expression softened as she stopped struggling. “We had a good run, but we were never going to last.” His fingers slipped a loose curl behind her ear before his hand drifted down to rest briefly at the base of her throat. “You knew that.”
“Kaine, please, let me—” she started, her voice shaking.
His expression turned cold again. “Anything I wanted. It was your deal.”
Her lungs were beginning to burn. She tried again to pull away, but she couldn’t breathe. The crisp edges of him were blurring. He was speaking, but the words were growing rounded.
Kaine pulled her closer, and the cold determination on his face was shifting into worry.
“Helena—breathe.”
Her vision tunnelled, all darkness except him.
He shook her. “Helena—don’t—come on—breathe—Helena, please …”
Her fingers grasped at him as she fought to speak.
“No—” Her voice was broken. “—don’t do this to me.”
The devastation swallowed her like a tidal wave, and he vanished.
WHEN SHE REGAINED CONSCIOUSNESS, KAINE was leaning over her once again. She stared at him. Her left arm hurt as if there was a deep bruise just below the shoulder. Her body felt wrong. Numb. Her mind sluggish.
She blinked, and even that took effort and concentration. Then everything came back with almost violent anguish.
She struggled to focus. The pain in her arm was likely some kind of injected sedative. Kaine had drugged her, but there was also a mineral salt aftertaste on her tongue that she recognised as her tablets. He’d used them to erase the panicked surge of adrenaline, to set her heart at a slow, steady rhythm. He’d made her calm and malleable.
She glared up at him, trying to find words.
“I’m never going to forgive you for this,” she finally managed. The words came out slurred, giving them an irregular lilt.
Kaine’s lips tightened into a flat line, but then he nodded. “I know you won’t, but you’ll be alive and away from the war. Those were always my terms.”
Helena went silent, trying to think despite being transmuted to the verge of incoherence.
There was a well of rage seething through her that she couldn’t quite reach, as if it were just beyond her fingertips.
She had to think slowly, laboriously, struggling to keep her focus razor-sharp because when she let it falter, her thoughts turned nebulous. She was surreptitious as she curled her fingers against her palm, just enough to send her resonance through her own body, trying to reverse Kaine’s tampering, but it had settled.
“If you die, who’s going to stop Morrough?” Her voice was dull.
His expression turned cold. “He can have Paladia for all I care. If the Eternal Flame wanted to win, they should have made better choices. They all knew the risks, but that was never enough incentive for them. They refused to pay the price that victory demands, and I am sick of watching you try to pay it for them.”
He tried to take her hand, but she recoiled from him. Hurt flashed in his eyes, but he swallowed, his jaw set.
“It’s time to go,” he said.
“No.”
His eyes narrowed and grew flintlike. “You gave your word.”
Helena inhaled through clenched teeth. “I know. And I will go, per your demands, but I need to speak with—Shiseo. If I can teach him how to use the obsidian I have left, he can pass on the information to the survivors, and then at least they’ll have a chance—”
