Page 119 of Touch the Sky
I crumple, howling in pain as I hunch over my foot.
“TESS!”
Before I know what’s happening or how she got here, Jacinthe is at my side, her face cast in eerie shadows from the criss-crossing beams of our flashlights.
“What happened?” she demands, laying a hand on my shoulder. “Are you hurt?”
I shrug her off.
“I’m fine. Just go, okay?” I grimace against the ache as I stand back up. “Just go look for her! What the hell are you doing here with me?”
A flash of confusion and hurt crosses her face. Guilt twists in my gut, but the fury building in me is stronger.
“She’smissing, Jacinthe!” I shriek. “My kid is fucking missing in the middle of the night, and it’s because of us! We are so fuckingstupid.”
I clutch my stomach as a wave of bile threatens to climb up my throat.
I know I shouldn’t yell at her like this, but I need to yell. I’m so angry I feel sick, and there’s no one else around to be mad at.
“I know—” Jacinthe tries to soothe.
I cut her off with a snarl.
“Do you, though? Do you know? You’re not a mother. This is just some fun forbidden sex game for you, but it’s mylife. It’s my kid, and she’s gone. I should never have said yes to any of this.”
I brush past her, my flashlight’s beam weaving wildly through the air.
“We should never have moved to this farm at all.”
I hear Jacinthe make a low, mournful sound, like a wounded animal.
The noise pierces straight through my chest. I feel heat pricking the corners of my eyes, but I don’t slow down. I don’t turn around. I leave her there and head towards the only thing that matters, the thing I never should have let myself lose focus on, not even for a second.
My daughter.
“She has to be here,” I promise myself.
We’re up to fifty minutes of searching when I hear voices start calling my name instead of Shel’s.
Something between hope and dread spikes in my veins, making me feel even woozier than I already am. I sprint down tothe farmyard from where I’ve been searching under all the cars in the driveway for the third time.
“Tess is coming!” Maddie yells, the first to spot me as I dash down the hill.
She’s standing under the stark white glare of the motion sensor light attached to the barn, with Gabrielle and Natalie at her side.
I’m so focused on covering the distance between us I don’t even notice they’re all sporting huge, relieved smiles until I skid to a stop on the gravel. Gabrielle has her palms pressed together and looks like she might be praying.
Somehow, their relief isn’t enough to cut through my panic.
Nothing will kill my panic except seeing Shel myself.
“What is it?” I demand. “Is she here? Is she safe?”
Maddie nods. She’s still wearing her cat ears, and the black whisker lines drawn on her face have turned streaky.
“She’s fine. She’s in the hayloft.”
Everyone’s gaze shifts to the top of the staircase running up the front of the barn. I can’t see anything but darkness past the open door.
