Page 12 of Flameborne: Fury
Ronen blew out a breath and looked like he might ask difficult questions, so I hurried on. “Focus her Trial on testing her limits,” I said through clenched teeth.
“Yes, Sir.”
“But, take care, Ronen. She’ll face enough risk in this, let’s not defeat her before she’s even begun.”
Ronen nodded again. I didn’t move. Couldn’t. My head spun, my heart screaming, every fiber in me fought this conclusion, while I tried desperately to convince my body that I hadnosay in it.
Ronen rose from his seat and came to stand in front of me, locking eyes. “Sir, she’ll be well taken care of. She isn’t my first,” he said quietly.
My jaw tightened. “I’m aware.” Ronen carried more secrets than any other Squad Leader.
“We’ll help her. You don’t need to worry.”
I nodded, but didn’t answer because if I opened my mouth I’d make it very, very clear to him exactly why that statement deserved to be taken outside and shot. But that wasn’t appropriate. I’d been elated when Voski was raised to the Fang. I’d trained Gil myself. There was noappropriatereason for me to be anything but thrilled that we’d found another Rider whose talents potentially fulfilled this unique role.
And particularlyher. The doors that might open boggled the mind.
And every single one of them forcing her to walk into the lion’s den of her fears,the still, small voice of wisdom whispered in the back of my head.
And every single one of them taking her away from the Keep. Likely for the majority of her career,the hateful voice of my own fear added.
I swallowed the flutter of panic that wanted to rise in my chest and focused on Ronen again. “If we’re right and this is truly her calling, she will have to face far worse than what we’d throw at her for the sake of the trial.”
Ronen was grim, but he agreed immediately.
“Are you certain?” I pushed, aware that I’d waver if it was my job to make the final call.
“I am,” he said firmly. “I need to see her find her confidence and there’s only one way to do that—to face the things that scare her.”
“Then we’re in agreement. Run with it. Hold nothing back. Make sure she’s challenged in the ways that are hardest forher—whichwill be different from the men. If she can’t push through under our eyes, she won’t make it when she’s alone.”
Ronen agreed. “You know, Donavyn,” he said warily. “I don’t like it either, but can’t you see the brilliance of the Creator’s plan in this? I mean,her?”
“Yes, of course.” My tone was more dismissive than was right, but something churned, twisting in my chest. I couldn’t find my balance.
As Ronen reluctantly made the note that would decide Bren’s fate on the last piece of paper, then gathered everything he’d brought, I stood over him with my arms folded.
The words poured out of me when he stood, though I hadn’t thought to ask them. “Do you care for her, Ronen?” I asked gruffly.
Ronen frowned. “Of course. I care for all my men. And she’s one of them.”
I looked at him frankly. Ronen took my meaning and arched one brow. “Have I said or done something to give the wrong impression?”
“No. but we all need checks and balances at times. Remember that. It’s never wrong to question, only to disrespect. Part of leadership is being willing to ask—and answer—the hard questions.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
Ronen shifted his papers to the other arm. “In that case… do you?”
I went still, frowning. “Do I what?”
“Doyoucare for her?”
I went very, very still.I’d been too obvious. Too undisciplined. It had to stop.I took my time, staring at him and not letting my gaze stray. I had to, because I was bracing to lie and it had been a very long time since I had lied about anything meaningful.
“It’s undeniable that I have a soft spot for her,” I admitted. “She’s in an untenable position. I admire what she’s doing with it. But that’s all.”
