Page 80 of Flameborne: Fury
Bren’s eyes widened and she raised her hands, palms towards me. “No, no. It wasn’t—he didn’t manage it. Not really. He stopped the moment I pushed him away. But our squads were both there, and my brothers rushed to my defense—which made his brothers step in to defend him and… it’s a mess. Afucking mess. And all because I can’t bear a surprise. He didn’t try to hurt me, Donavyn—”
“Hekissedyou?” The words rippled up from my balls. My hands were fists at my sides. I was suddenly glad Kgosi wasn’t close enough to communicate. He would have torn down the stable walls on his way to bite the little fucker in half. As it was, I had to fight the immediate, gut-deep urge for vengeance. Forpunishment.
But Bren rushed to me, gripping my jacket, her eyes wide and pleading, her voice too high and thin.
“No, no, Donavyn,don’t.Can’t you see? Saul is a good man. He’s naive. He thought we could be something. He stopped the moment I pushed him away. But that’s why I’m upset! I could have just saidnoand he would have stopped. It would have been awkward, but nothing else. But Ipanicked.Our squads almost came to blows and—”
“I hope they ripped him a new asshole,” I growled.
“Please, Donavyn,don’t.That wasn’t what upset me!”
“Another man kissed you and you weren’t upset?” I snarled.
“Yes! But…” she clawed her hands into her hair, and I fought back the violence in me that yearned to be unleashed. Not at her, but at that little prick who—
“Donavyn, Saul isn’t the problem.Iam. I know he’s good. Iknowthat! I’m not scared of him. But when he touched me, it could have been anyone. My body—”
“He touched you?”I gripped her arms and pulled her to me, demanding, insistent. Bren dropped her face into her hands and sank into my chest.
“Please, Donavyn,listen.He didn’t hurt me. I’m telling you, the problem isme,”she blurted into my chest. “I’m a grown woman. AFuryknight.I should take a shock without turning into a puddle of… of… fear!” She lifted her head and her eyes were red, wisps of her hair pulled free of her braid and flutteringaround her face as she stared at me, pleading. “What’s wrong with me?! Why does it always end like this?”
I fought the beast within me. Wrestling, because she was soft and scared and in my arms. She needed me. And there was nothing I wanted more than to soothe her. But Ialsodeeply wanted to leave her closed into this little room, away from everyone else, while I put violent hands on that little shit.
She trembled and I knew: I could help her, or beat him. I couldn’t do both. And she was more important.
“There’s nothing wrong with you,” I managed through my teeth, though my tone was more stern than reassuring.
“Yes, there is!” she insisted. “How the hell am I going on a mission with my squad or my Wing if I leap out of my skin the moment I get surrounded? They raised me tostealth,Donavyn! I have to be able to stand in the face of an unwanted advance—or even just a group of men standing too close without meaning anything—”
“No man should be touching you, especially if you’re on a mission—”
“That’s not what I meant!” she wailed, then dropped her chin, shaking her head, her finger curling into my jacket and gripping, still trembling.
I made myself focus on her. Made myself put aside the rage and possessive fury that wanted to break that little fucker’s neck, and wrapped my arms around her, holding her tightly, remembering that we’d been about to talk about everything that had happened to her—the things that had wired her this way—when I found out about the camp she’d found. I’d been distracted. But I wouldn’t be again.
She needed to talk.
“Breathe,” I whispered as gently as I could. “Breathe, and relax.”
“But—”
“No buts, Bren. You won’t get past this until you can think clearly, and you won’t think clearly until you’re not panicking anymore. I felt you. I’m here. I’m not leaving. I won’t touch him. Now, breathe.”
I slid fingers up the back of her neck and gripped her hair under her braid, trying to make my own breath ease because through the bond, my tension and anger were feeding her fear. Thank God I’d been bonded to Kgosi for so long and he’d taught me how that spiral worked.
Holding her tightly, I made myself center. Breathe deeply and slowly. Slow my heart. Release the anger and possessive jealousy. Release the petty desire to wreak vengeance on a lad who had no clue what he’d done. Release the frustration of knowing she harbored wounds she still hadn’t trusted me enough to reveal.
Time. All of this would take time. But it was the one resource we were terribly poor in.
“How did you get away from the Quee—”
I shushed her and stroked a hand down her spine, unwilling to admit thatIstruggled for control. The last thing I needed was a reminder of yet another obstacle to our peace.
“Just breathe,” I murmured. She sighed heavily, but her weight shifted and I felt the tension slowly leaching out of her. “That’s better,” I whispered, still stroking her back and wrestling with my own anger at all the obstacles we faced.
But the more I cleared my head, the morepresentthe bond became, bringing with it that urgency for contact that we’d been fighting since the dragons united. I’d been distracted by the Queen and the King, by the ceremony, by the duty of my job. But now, with her warm body pressed to mine, the low heat that had simmered in the background came roaring to the front.
Though the voice in the back of my head still called for Saul’s blood, it was a gnat buzzing my ear against the rising tide of need building in my body.
