Page 34 of Bitten By Bloodmoon
I cry at everything I’ve lost. Rowena. My father. My pack. I don’t even have Kael to talk to.
I cry about my haunting memories of the Moonlight pack’s initiation. A pack I no longer want to belong to.
I’m nothing but a human—a pathetic, weak human.
“Fuck!” I scream at the top of my lungs, letting everything out. The tears slow, only because there are no tears left in my ducts.
I snap my mouth shut. I will not be weak. I will not let anyone else control me, not anymore.
I don’t know what I’m going to do, just that I have to do something—anything.
I leave the room in a flurry, not really sure what I’m doing, just following my intuition. I don’t know my way around this huge castle. I don’t know where I’m headed or why, but as I move, I just know that I’m headed in the right direction. So I keep going.
I find myself in the basement, standing in front of a set of closed double doors. I don’t know what’s behind them, but I know this is where I’m supposed to be right now. Whatever is behind it is exactly what I need.
I don’t knock; I just push the doors open.
The lights are turned off, but my wolf eyesight still works. It’s the only part of me that is better than a human.
It’s a massive gym.
There are weights and cardio machines on one far side, a sparring ring in the middle, and a few punching bags on the other.
I walk toward the punching bags, not even bothering to turn the lights on. When I reach the first one, I let my hand run down the cool leather. Emeric taught me the very basics of how to throw a punch, but I never got very good at it. I never had enough time. Even if I did, I never had the will to take my training seriously enough.
Now, it’s all I have. I’m human. I live in a world of wolf shifters, witches, and vampires. I can’t rely on my wolf abilities. I have to learn how to rely on my human strength. It’s all I have left.
I throw a punch.
The bag barely moves, and my hand already feels bruised, but it also feels satisfying. So I do it again. I feel a gentle tightening of my skin across my scar, but it barely aches. Riven healed me well. The minuscule amount of pain doesn’t stop me from hitting the bag again and again. I don’t think as I throw punches, but if I hadn’t cried earlier, I know this release of sorts would have done it. I keep going until I’m breathless and hugging the bag to keep myself from collapsing.
“It’s not going to be enough,”his voice sounds in my head.
I squeeze my eyes shut and clench my teeth at the invasion.“Get out.”
“It’s not going to be enough,” Nyx says out loud this time.
I don’t have to open my eyes to know where he is in the room.
“So why should I even bother, right?”
“That’s not what I said. You should train every day. Learn all of your strengths and weaknesses. We all should. But it alone won’t be enough to protect you.”
I open my eyes and turn, watching him circling me in the dark. The question that’s been bothering me the most escapes my lips. “Can you use your mind control to control when I shift? To control my wolf?”
He pauses for a second. “Yes.”
I shake my head, hating that the universe sent me two mating bonds to choose from and then gave both of them the power to control me.Fucking unbelievable.
He doesn’t bother to tell me he won’t. I know he will if he needs me to. And I hate it.
“And you still think you’re my mate if you’re willing to control me?”
He doesn’t show me any of his feelings. His expression doesn’t change. “I think the gods are playing games with us. Making it as difficult as possible to break the curses. I’m not sure what to believe anymore.”
I frown, but he’s right. I’m also completely lost when it comes to who my mate is or if I even have one. I share a link with Ambrose and Nyx that allows me to communicate with them mentally. That doesn’t mean anything. I fell in love with Ambrose, but that doesn’t mean anything either.
“I do think there is a reason that the three of us are linked, though.”
