Page 41 of Bitten By Bloodmoon
“What would have happened if you didn’t kill him?”
I raise my head, finally looking her in the eyes, trying to decide how much to tell her. “Vampires used to live for thousands of years. An immortal lifespan if they weren’t killed by another creature. The curse shortened that lifespan considerably, making us mortal. Every time we feed, our lifespan shortens and our minds weaken until the curse takes hold of us.
Once it does, there is no reversing it. We lose everything that makes us us. We lose control over our minds. We become rabid animals who only want to feed and feed and feed. We want to feed the curse. Our curse only wants blood. It wants to use us to wipe out the world. If I didn’t kill him, he would have tried to kill everything and everyone in his path until he went so insane that he would have driven a stake through his own heart.”
She stares at me for a minute, processing. “How long do you have before that happens to you?”
I chuckle. “Worried about me, love?”
She doesn’t answer. “How long?”
“Longer than most, as I’m a half wolf shifter. I don’t usually have to feed on blood at all, and not feeding seems to keep the curse from starting.”
“Why did some of the vampires not want you to kill him? It seemed like a mercy.”
“They hoped he could be saved when the curse is broken and reversed. But death is final; there is no coming back from that.”
She nods slowly. “You did the right thing, ending his life. He wouldn’t have been able to live with himself even if his curse was reversed.”
I don’t respond even though I agree with her.
“How did you become a vampire lord? I wouldn’t think they’d trust a filthy half-breed.”
I watch her as she walks around the room, running her hand over the fabrics of the chairs and down the lines of the curtainsas if she can’t stay still. The fabric of her shirt, my shirt, wafts as she walks, until our scents mix in my direction.
I hold my breath, not allowing myself to smell us together. She’s not mine, and the longer I spend with her, the more I know she’ll never be. She’s destined for far greater things than the likes of me. She can’t be tied to a man fated to die a cruel, savage death like that vampire I killed.
“There are seven vampire lords. When one dies, anyone interested in becoming a successor goes to the king. He’s the one who decides who the next lord will be,” I reply.
She watches me closely, waiting for me to say more. When I don’t, she asks, “And what did you have to do to prove to the vampire king that you were worthy of becoming a lord?”
My body tenses as if remembering alone will put me back in that place. “Enough.”
“Why put yourself through it?”
“To protect my pack.”
Her eyes soften a little as if she understands me better. But I don’t want her to understand me. I don’t want her to be unafraid of me. I’m capable of killing her without any remorse. She needs to realize that.
“How did you escape?” I ask her.
“Quickly,” she says, throwing a one-word answer at me like I did her.
But unlike me, she’s screaming her thoughts at me. I can see how she tricked Sylara into thinking she had womanly problems, for which she needed help retrieving supplies. How Brax was distracted by an ask to retrieve wine for her, which left her and Riven alone. How she just straight up told him her plans, and he allowed her to walk right out the door, thinking it was the right thing to do. He’s always had the biggest heart when it comes to allowing others free will. Flashes of her following my scent and her intuition led her to me. I saw her watching me, in awe ofmy power. I feel her fear and how she pushed past it to confront the vampires. How she’s truly not afraid of death, and how tired she is of being controlled. How she won’t allow herself to be controlled ever again.
“Get. Out. Of. My. Head!”She yells so loudly, trying to shove me out. Instead, she just sends her thoughts even louder to me.
“I can’t, not unless you block me out. You’re screaming your thoughts so loudly, and our connection is so strong that it’s as if you are talking to me.”
She frowns.“Get out. I know you can. Stop getting in my head.”
I force myself out. I try to sever the connection, but it feels like cutting off one of my arms. It feels wrong not to be in her head.
I frown at that.
“You claim you’re my mate, but you’re not better than Ambrose. You’re both controlling assholes.”
I wince. “I’m not controlling anything when you send your thoughts to me. Learn to block me if you don’t want me in your mind.”
