Page 61 of Undone
Remy
“No sign of a radio?” Tater asked me in the breakfast line as we pushed our trays down the counter. His sudden nearness beside me caused me to feel lightheaded.
“No,” I whispered without looking at him. Kelsey was ahead of me, and Ronaldo tucked into line behind Tater. I sent the boy a smile, and he gave me a small one in return.
I felt Tater’s tension. His dire need for something to happen. He took a cup of canned peaches and flung it to his tray, then one on Ronaldo’s.
“Be patient,” I said, trying not to move my lips.
“Has he touched you?”
His bold question took me by surprise and I thought about how Tater and I had left things at Dugway, about how I’d told both him and Matt that I didn’t want or need a man. That I needed to be alone. Did I still feel that way? As much as I cared for Tater, the more complicated things became, the more I found myself pulling away all over again, to spare us both. If Tater saw us as a couple, his jealousy toward the Senator would only grow.
I hesitated too long, and heard his sharp exhale and saw the clench of his fist.
“Nothing happened,” I swore. “Our hands touched once. That’sall.”
He huffed humorlessly through his nose. “I saw the way he looked at you when he brought them.” He jutted his chin down to Kelsey. “It’s only a matter of time.”
“Well, he’ll never make a move.”
“Do you want him to?”
“No.” I didn’t hesitate this time, but the answer left me feeling a pit of disgusting guilt. Did I want him to? No. In my mind I knew that was the right answer.No.
“And it’s not something you need to worry about or ask me about ever again,” I said firmly.
I placed a cup of water on my tray for Kelsey, and coffee on mine. Then I touched the girl’s shoulder. “Follow me, sweetie. Hold your tray nice and tight.” I didn’t glance back at Tater because guards stood at the end of the line.
Kelsey was so small she practically had to stretch her arms all the way out to hold the tray. I could tell it was heavy for her, but she did it. We sat with the other young girls, who’d been paramount in showing Kelsey how to be tough and more independent throughout the day. Not to mention her time with Linette, who did not treat the child with warm and fuzzies. Kelsey still liked her, though, probably because she felt safe.
Nights were harder. Kelsey cried when we tried to put her in her own bed. Now, Kelsey would fall asleep in bed with Macy while I whispered our lessons and story time. And then I’d silently climb down and move Kelsey to her own bed. So far it hadn’t been a problem, but each time felt like a small victory.
I passed her off to Linette after breakfast, ignoring the woman’s scowl warning that she’d taken to giving me every morning. If I had to translate, I was betting she said something like, “Make yourself useful and find out some information, or screw the leader so we can get out of here.” Both of which left me feeling terrified and slimy.
Imagine my surprise when I walked into the school room at the palace and found the Senator already there, speaking with the children as they stared up at him.
I paused in the doorway, surprised, until the guard nudged me forward with the butt of her gun. I went in and placed my bag on the desk, giving him a polite smile when he approached.
“Are the new children acclimating to Primo Town?”
“Yes, sir. Thank you.” I made myself keep eye contact, though I felt shy and embarrassed. His eyes were deceptively gentle as he tried to read me.
“We should speak after the lessons.”
Oh, no. My belly bottomed out, swooping.
“Okay.” I tried to smile, pushing hair nervously behind my ears. He nodded and hesitated a moment before turning to leave. It took me a full minute to compose myself enough to address the waiting children. This was going to be a long day.
I was a bundle of nerves as I stood outside against the wall during the children’s afternoon exercise time. I’d learned not to watch, ignoring the thumps of kids falling, the shouts of pain. If the instructor needed me, she would call for me, but otherwise I stood there staring at the ground.
Outside of the fence, two vehicles zoomed past at top speed, making both the instructor and I look up. They rounded the corner, out of sight, but I heard them squeal to a stop, doors opening and slamming shut, feet hitting the ground at a sprint, voices shouting.
My heart kicked up inside my chest. What was going on? My first instinct was to get the children inside to safety, but they were under the instructor’s care, and she’d already gotten back to business. I stared around, and my heart nearly stopped. From afar, a plume of smoke rose into the sky. Fire outside of the base.
The doors burst open and a guard shouted at the instructor. “Get the children inside!”
She didn’t ask questions, and it only took a few seconds to gather all of the children and get them lined up. I took the front of the line and the instructor took the back. Once we were inside, the guard locked the door and ushered the children down a private hall. They stopped me when I tried to follow.
