Page 30 of Sparks
My heart began to accelerate. “Beth, no. I need to go home. I’m sorry.”
The guys were standing there now looking at us. Except Rick, who acted as though we were invisible.
“You just kissed him,” she said at full volume, causing hot blood to creep up into my face. “I don’t understand what the problem is.”
“I’m tired!” I wanted to strangle her for putting me on the spot like this.
“You’re ruining a perfectly fun night out. I’m not ready to go to bed. I’m staying with them.”
“You can’t go alone,” I said, feeling guilty and torn. I wanted her to have fun but letting her go alone was breaking girl code. “Beth,” I hissed, lowering my voice. “I don’t have money for a cab home. Please, let’s just go. Get their numbers and you can hang out another night.”
Her face hardened and her tiny mouth puckered, filling me with dread. “I’m going.”
I looked to Rick, but he ignored me, so I met eyes with one of the other guys. “Would you be able to drop me at home?”
“Jersey City?” His whole demeanor was lackadaisical. “Nah, that’s the opposite direction.”
“Yeah, not happening,” the other guy said. “Just call a cab.” Their faces were so serious. I hadn’t seen any of them smile other than Rick’s humor at my overly-innocent expense.
Fear kicked through my bloodstream at the thought of being abandoned here. I pleaded with Beth through my eyes until she groaned and threw her head back.
“Fine. I’ll call you a cab. But you’re paying me back.”
I blanched. “You’re not coming with me?”
“I told you, I’m going without you.” She looked so pissed, pushing her skinny arms into her jacket, glaring pixie-daggers at me. I continued to silently beg her to change her mind until she looked away from me with an exasperated shake of her head and the five of them walked to the door. She was really going.
“Be careful!” I called to Beth. “Don’t forget to order my cab! Please!”
I heard her mumble, “Oh, my God” just before the doors of the pub closed behind them, leaving me with eighties music playing lightly overhead. I turned to the bartender, who raised an eyebrow.
“We close in ten,” he said.
I nodded. “Okay. I have a cab on the way.” I walked to the window to watch. My stomach felt like I’d eaten ten lemons. Was Beth really going into Manhattan with four sketchy guys we’d just met? It was a Sunday night! Places would be closing, so they’d have to go to someone’s home. What was I thinking? I should have womaned-up so she wasn’t alone!
I chewed my thumbnail. The streets were dark and barren tonight. Maybe because it was a Sunday. Maybe because only Beth and I, along with the gang lords, were crazy enough to come out when there was still so much snow.
“Two minutes,” the bartender called.
My chest flamed. I texted Beth.
What is the cab’s ETA?
Two minutes passed and my palms began to sweat as the music stopped. I was so buzzed. The phone blurred as I stared at it.
Beth, the bar is closing and the cab isn’t here. Did you order??
“Need me to call a cab for you?” The bartender sounded annoyed.
“My friend was supposed to call one. I don’t have money.”
He made an annoyed huffing sound and I wanted to scream. I dialed Beth and it went to her voicemail. I left a message. I called Holly but it went straight to voicemail. Cheryl’s rang but went to voicemail too. My knees were trembling. Shit, shit, shit!
As much as I didn’t want to bother or worry my parents on their trip, I called Mom. Straight to voicemail. Same with Dad. Are you fucking kidding me right now? Even in Europe I expected my parents to always be available! I felt so alone. What about Silas? No, he was probably back in California by now. That wouldn’t go over well.
Could I call any of my high school friends? A wave of shame hammered me at the thought of how they’d talk shit about me not having my life together.
Drunken panic possessed me, and I scrolled through my contacts until I saw Shawn’s number. I stared at it for a long, breathless moment. I’d just told him we’d be better off as strangers, and I’d meant it. I couldn’t call him, could I? But he’d insisted I could. Just as friends, right? This was crazy! I couldn’t do it. I stared at the screen praying Beth would write.
