Page 9 of Sparks
His eyes bulged. “Never?”
“Not from anything we did together.”
His eyebrows went up. “From…other guys?”
“No! From, you know, my own self.” Oh, gawd.
“Ah.” He cleared his throat, smiling tightly down at his drink.
My cheeks heated, and my head felt light. I waswayyybuzzed.
“So, anyway.” I took a long drink. “We jumped on the bandwagon and got engaged but it felt wrong. I kept finding excuses to put off setting a date. But once I graduated, I knew he was ready, and I just couldn’t drag it out any longer. It was awful.” My voice thickened with emotion and I cursed my stupid burning eyes. “And everyone was so mad at me. All my friends. Because why would I let go such a nice guy who clearly loved me so much?” I wiped the corners of my eyes and took another drink. “That’s when I saw the ad. My parents couldn’t believe I was going to waste my college training. I had a teaching job lined up, and I just felt smothered and horrible. I needed to get far away from everything.”
“That had to be hard, but you did the right thing. You wouldn’t have been happy. A broken engagement is better than a divorce.”
I know this guy was basically a stranger, but his words still felt like a balm. I didn’t realize how much guilt and regret I still carried until I put it all out there.
“And I know your friends and family are sad or whatever, but it’s not their life, and hopefully they’ll come around. You’re the one who’d have to live with that decision. I’ve seen enough of my men and women jumping into marriage for the wrong reasons, and there is always hell to pay, both emotionally and financially.” I lost myself in his bright blue eyes while he spoke, but his words made me wonder.
“You’re like a relationship guru. Have you been married?”
“Nah.” His eyes shifted down. “I’ve been engaged a couple years, though.”
My drink stopped halfway to my lips as my entire body razed with hot coals. I slowly lowered my hand. “You’re engagednow?”
With his head bowed, he slowly lifted his eyes, almost regretfully. “Yes.”
I nodded as my gut cramped. And then nodded some more. I nodded way too long until my horrible eyes began to blur. Those crystal blue eyes were watching me with what I could only call regret. A strange sense settled deep in my belly, like a warning from my intuition telling me I was in a danger zone. I began to stand.
“Harlow—”
“Just running to the bathroom,” I said.
I moved quickly through the bodies, my thoughts shouting louder than the music.
Of course. Of-fucking-course he was engaged. Of course the good-looking man who had spent the last hour making me feel special was already taken. I pushed into the bathroom and leaned against the sink, breathing hard and fast. Fuck my life.
It took me a full minute of deep breathing to stop shaking. I inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly, shaking out my arms. Then I ran my fingers through my hair, plucked my cheeks and wiped under my eyes. Okay. I would march out there, say good night to Jerome, get my phone from where I’d left it in my chair, and go to bed. No harm done.
But when I opened the bathroom door, Shawn pushed off the wall and stood before me, peering down with genuine concern in his eyes. His nearness made my heart sputter.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I almost told you, but I didn’t want you to think I was assuming you were interested in me or something. I was just really enjoying our conversation and your company.”
“It’s okay,” I said, swallowing again. “I should probably just go to bed, though.”
“No, please.” His eyes were pitiful, making me sigh. “Just a little while longer? You don’t have to talk to me anymore if you don’t want. But I don’t want to chase you off. We can be friends, right?”
I wanted to tell him I had enough friends, but the sweetness in his eyes made me tamp down the fire I felt. “Sure.” I didn’t want to be friends, but I also didn’t think he’d meant to do any harm, so I would try to let go of my disappointment and just enjoy the night.
He grinned and headed back to our seats, but I was snagged around the waist by Jerome as “Get Low” hit my ears. Oh, yes. This I could do. I laughed and raised my arms up as the entire freaking room began to dance. Literally, not a body was still, and everyone shouted the lyrics.To the windowwww, to the wall!I laughed as we danced, and through the movement I caught sight of Shawn in his chair, just watching us with that half-grin, his eyes looking thoughtful. I might have done my sexiest dance moves, letting my ass fall in rhythm all the way to the floor. Whoopsie. Soldiers hooted all around me, making me feel like an entertainer extraordinaire.
We all cheered when the song ended and I hugged Jerome before making my way back to my drink. I probably shouldn’t have had anymore, but self-control when it came to alcohol had never been my strong suit. I threw it back, making Shawn raise his eyebrows.
“You good?”
“Yeah,” I said, though I felt a little pissy at him for not being single. The nerve.
I picked up my phone to look at the time and that stupid firework icon was still there. Only it had a notification bubble with the number 100 on it.
