Page 90 of Sparks
Something had to give.
To say Silas was cold toward me the next day was an understatement. He was like a stranger. A stranger who had zero interest in speaking to me or knowing me. A stranger who thought everything pilot Heather said was incredibly funny and interesting. At one point I imagined them going at it in the cockpit and I almost threw up. I was losing it, big time.
Every word we said to each other was absolutely necessary and strictly professional. It broke every part of me that hadn’t been already broken by Shawn.
We got back to the airport and walked into the hall outside the crew room. Every face turned toward us. Silas’s copilot friend, Lee, said, “Dude! Your wife is here!” His words razed across my skin like a jagged razor.
“What?” Silas’s voice was hard, and his back went ramrod straight as he turned and moved.
I followed them like a stiff corpse to the crew room lounging area where a group of crew members surrounded a woman who looked so out of place it wasn’t even funny. Jacquie made every flight attendant in the room look frumpy. No offense to Willa, Syd, and Holly, whose expressions were unreadable as they nodded at something Jacquie was saying. And don’t get me started on the pilots, young and old, who stared and jostled to get in front and catch her attention.
Her hair was to her butt, glossy and dark brown with waves of perfection. Nails long and bright red. Lips full, and also glistening red. Latina face with cheekbones that would slice. A red dress that hung low on her shoulders, cleavage pouring out, fitted and stopping just below her ass. She was like something on a magazine. I’d literally never seen someone in real life who looked like that. Her thighs, calves, and arm muscles were perfectly sculpted.
“Joss, what are you doing here?” Oh, my gawd he called her by a nickname. Putrid jealousy slithered through me.
I stood in the doorway and watched as Jacquie found Silas and brought her hands together under her chin, puppy dog eyes and pouty lips. “Hi, baby. I had to see you. We need to talk.”
Silas looked around the room and caught sight of her purple suitcase. “Come on. Let’s go. Civilians aren’t even supposed to be in the crew room.”
She stuck out her pouty lips and wiggled her fingers at everyone. My friends all raised their hands and waved weirdly. Silas made eye-contact with precisely no one as he picked up both their bags and headed down the hall. She rocked stilettos as she walked beside him. He stopped at the end of the hall to open the door, setting down one piece of luggage, and putting a hand on her lower back to lead her out before he picked up the luggage again.
That hand on the back did me in.
“Harlow, sweetie?” Holly said. My eyes were unfocused when I tried to look at my friends standing there.
“I’m okay,” I whispered, though I’d never felt less okay. “I just need a second.” I knew something was going to have to give, and now was the time.
I walked into the bathroom and pulled out my phone. I nearly dropped it with my trembling hand but managed to finally make the call.
“Honey! How’s it going?” Mom’s voice was vibrant and full of love.
“Hey,” I said, trying to be strong. “Is there any way you could overnight those savings bonds to me? And maybe pray for me too? I’m not feeling well. Emotionally.” I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the stall wall, trying really hard not to lose it for the millionth time this week.
“Paris?” she asked softly.
“Yeah.” I wiped my nose.
“By yourself?”
“Yes.” I sniffed.
“As much as it terrifies me to think of you traveling alone, I think it will be a wonderfully healing trip. Just tell me your exact dates and I’ll book the little boutique hotel in Montmartre. You will love it.”
“No, nothing like that. I’ll just stay at a hostel.”
“Over my dead body!” Her stern voice made my eyes pop open. “I’d be worried sick the whole time. I promise you—this place is adorable, and quaint, and affordable. But most importantly, safe.”
“Not fancy?”
“I’d call it quirky with a splash of class.”
“Yeah,” I said, feeling my soul smile a little. “That’s what I want. Thank you, Mom.”
“Bonds and prayer coming right up. We love you, Low-Low.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose and took a deep breath. “I love you guys too.”
My friends were waiting for me in the hall when I came out. They surrounded me, and I opened myself to their love.
