Page 77 of Heathens

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Salem: Have you read it?

Me: No.

Salem: Good.

Me: Why is that good?

Salem: Because I want to see your face when you read the last chapter.

Me: I saw the Disney movie...

Salem: It’s not the same. Not even close.

Me: I love the music.

Salem: Stop.

Me: Did Esmeralda really have a goat?

Salem: I’m not going to dignify that with a response.

Me: And I guess there are no talking gargoyles?

Salem: ...

Me: Is that a no?

Salem: No. What was your major in college?

Me: Fine Arts.

Salem: When’s your birthday?

Me: November 13th.

Salem: You’re joking.

Me: I’m serious! Why?

Salem: My birthday is 13th November, too.

Me: WHAT? Really?

Salem: Yes.

Me: What’s your favorite food?

Me: Wait, I know that. It's anything sweet, right?

Salem: I’m not sure anymore.

Me: What do you mean?

Salem: I think I liked the taste of you the most.

I squeeze my thighs together as I stare at his response.

Me: Bad priest.