Page 139 of Holy Hearts
“Not really,” I say, my voice hollow.
He studies me for a moment, his amusement fading into something softer. “We’re not going anywhere, you know,” he says quietly. “Whatever’s going on in that head of yours, you don’t have to deal with it alone.”
The words are meant to be comforting, but they only make the ache worse. Because I know the truth: Iwantthem. Both of them. But I don’t know if I can ever really have them.
That’s becoming clear with each passing day.
When Julian leans down to kiss me briefly, his lips warm and sure, I let him. Because for now, it’s enough.
But I don’t know how long it will be enough.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
THE FEAR
Malakai
Julian puts himself away, and then he walks to the door, unlocking it. For a second, I think he’s going to leave, but then he walks back over to where I’m standing.
A second later, his lips press against mine for a second kiss, soft and firm at the same time. An electric shock zings through me, sending a shock wave behind my hip bones. It’s the kind of kiss that makes me forget the torrent of thoughts threatening to spill out of me, the kind of kiss that makes me forget the tightrope I’m walking, the worry, and the contradictions that are slowly pulling me apart. As Julian groans into my mouth, there’s only him—the velvet feel of his lips against mine, the sensation of his tongue sliding against mine, and the quiet promise of the way he’s gripping me.
“Mine,” he growls against my lips, his teeth grazing just enough to make me shiver. “You’re fucking mine, Ravage.”
His hand slides up the back of my neck, tugging me closer until there’s no space left between us, his forehead resting against mine.
“I don’t care how long it’s been. I don’t care who’s touched you since. You were mine then, and you’re mine now.”
The weight of his words settles deep in my chest, and I swear he can feel the way my heart hammers against his.
“Say it,” he whispers, his thumb brushing along my jaw. “Say you’re mine.”
I do, because, in this moment, I can’t imagine belonging anywhere else.
“Yours,” I nearly whimper.
His hand comes around my neck, and I let out a low groan.
And then the door flies open.
“Malakai.”
The voice is sharp and full of disapproval, slicing through the quiet intimacy that we’ve created in this moment like a knife.
I pull away instantly, and as I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, the room begins to spin when I see Rod standing in the doorway. My heart drops down into my stomach. The look on his face can only be described as thinly veiled disgust. His mouth is open in surprise, but his eyes are as sharp as an eagle.
For a few seconds, none of us speak. The room remains quiet—charged.It’s fucking deafening. Then Rod steps into my office fully.
“I didn’t realize you had company,” he says, his tone cold and each word clipped. Flicking his eyes to Julian, they linger on him long enough for me to shift my weight uncomfortably.
This is bad.
Julian straightens, and he looks at me with something akin to pity. “I was just leaving,” he says, his voice devoid of any of the warmth from earlier.
“Were you?” Rod asks, his eyes narrowing on Julian. “It looked to me like the two of you were perhaps… busy.”
My neck burns. “That’s enough, Rod.” Somehow, I manage to keep my voice calm and steady. “Julian, I’ll see you later.”
Julian hesitates, his eyes searching mine—for what, I don’t know. But then he nods, and his expression softens just enough to remind me of what we were just doing. Brushing past Rod without a word, he leaves the office.
