Page 75 of Filtration Play
They hiked up the steps, their feet dragging and their whole body braced in tension. They had no idea what they’d find upon return.
Fin reached their apartment door and tested the knob. It was open. They stepped inside, the murmur of voices drifting their way.
They stopped and stared. Ollie was sitting on their couch with Julian. Mortification ripped through them, and they didn’t announce themself yet.
Ollie glanced up and stopped mid-word.
Julian followed his gaze, his eyes widening. “You’re back.” He rose from the seat, and his brows drew together as he scanned them over, pausing on the helluva shiner they’d gotten yesterday. “Fuck, you look like you’ve been through the wringer.”
Fin squeezed their nape. “You could say that.” They looked away from Ollie, shame pouring over them that they’d bolted the way they did. Fuck, they were such an asshole.
“So has this one,” Julian said, swinging over to kiss Ollie on the head. “Be gentle with him, okay?” Fin didn’t miss the stern note in his voice, which rang warning bells in their head. “And keep any kni—”
“I’ll pass along the warning myself, Jules,” Ollie said, his voice a low rasp. “Thanks.”
“Always,” Julian said. “Give me a call later tonight.” With that, Julian briskly strode for the door, leaving the two of them together.
The word “sorry” bubbled to Fin’s lips, but it felt paltry compared to everything that had gone down. “What do you need to tell me?” they asked instead.
“Ah,” Ollie said, his voice strained. “I called him over because I’m in the middle of a bad cutting headspace. He was staying to keep knives away from me.”
Oh fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Their bullshit drained away in the face of that. They marched right over to him and plopped down on the couch. “Did something happen? Did me leaving trigger that?” Their stomach churned with acid.
“It had been brewing for a while now,” he murmured. “Any big issue was going to be a catalyst.”
Fin placed their hand over their mouth, their eyes burning. While they’d been riding down the fucking freeway, Ollie had been suffering.
Fuck, they were such a monster.
“You shouldn’t have run,” Ollie said.
Fin swallowed the thick-as-fuck lump down their throat. “No, I shouldn’t have.” The urge to close the distance between them was unbearable. They wanted to crush Ollie in their arms because he was here, and he was perfect, and they couldn’t take that for granted.
They’d been so focused on the people who hadn’t wanted them that they’d forgotten about the ones who mattered.
That not everyone was like their parents.
“Can I hug you?” they asked, their hands balled into fists on their lap.
“You fucking better,” he said, his voice cracking. When they looked up, his dark brown eyes were watery, a hesitant grin there.
Fin launched themself at Ollie and wrapped their arms tight around him. Their bodies crushed together like two magnets trying to find each other again. Fin drew in a deep, shaky breath, inhaling his scent, all motor oil and musk. Fuck. They’d missed him so damn much, and their separation had only been since this morning.
However, this morning felt like a lifetime ago.
“I should’ve been here for you,” Fin said, their throat thick. They held on to him as if he might float away. The idea of Ollie facing that hell in their apartment while they’d been soaring down the highway—they swallowed hard.
“Then be there next time,” Ollie challenged. “Though honestly, it was good to let Julian in. He didn’t know about that part of my past at all.”
“I’m so damn proud of you.” They pressed a kiss along the side of his neck, the skin-to-skin connection soothing something ragged inside them. Ollie was here in their house, and they never wanted him to leave.
If he could move in today, they’d go and grab the U-Haul.
Fin brushed their lips over Ollie’s hesitantly for once. They weren’t sure if that was too far, if they’d ruined what had existed between them.
