Page 70 of Follow My Voice
“Kang.”
“I know,” he says, winking. “Klara sent me to ask if you’re going to the party, and if we can ride with you.”
Klara and Perla walk up and stop behind him, at a prudent distance. Klara catches my eye and then looks away. I swallow.
“Uh, well, I…”
Diego leans in through the open window, half his body inside the car, and whispers, “Or should I tell Klara that you spent ten minutes staring at her while she sat on the bleachers? The hand over the heart was a bit dramatic for my taste, but very moving.”
He straightens up and circles the car. “Let’s go, girls, get in.”
Perla and Klara don’t move.
I clear my throat. “Yeah, come on, hop in, I’ll give you a ride,” I say, forcing a smile.
The girls exchange glances, but finally walk toward the car.
Perla automatically gets in the back seat with Diego, leaving Klara no choice but to sit next to me up front.
Don’t hide from me.
I turn on music to drown out the silence and steal a glance at Klara, right here beside me, just within reach. My heart races. Somehow I manage to fight the urge to push back her hood.
I focus on navigating out of the parking lot, thinking what an idiot I’ve been to believe I can control how I feel, that I can keep myself from ever falling in love again.
30Welcome Me
HAVE PARTIES ALWAYSbeen this loud?
I cover my ears as we enter the house full of college kids. The place is large and packed with people. My heart is racing and my breath comes fast; I’m not prepared to deal with a social event like this, still a little nervous after the panic attack I had at the soccer field. I tried to get out of it, but Perla insisted she would stay with me at all times. The fact that I’m here with Kang doesn’t help matters, either. I’ve made up my mind to push my feelings for him aside. I don’t want to go through what Perla did, mistaking his kindness for something more. After riding next to him in the car, however, I realize how much harder it is to ignore your feelings for someone when they’re sitting right beside you.
I follow Perla to an empty corner of the living room and Diego and Kang stop beside us.
“Would you like a drink?” Diego shouts so that we can hear him over the music.
Perla nods. She looks at me, but I shake my head. Mixing alcohol and antidepressants is never a good idea, or so I’ve been warned multiple times by Dr. B. and my sister—as if I’ve ever hada drink in my life. Diego then looks to Kang, who also shakes his head.
Diego grabs Perla by the arm and I watch in panic as he pulls her away through the crowd, leaving me alone with Kang. So much for not leaving my side. My heart beats even more wildly, something I didn’t think possible. I glance around the room, trying not to look at him, frowning over the volume of the music. I can feel Kang’s eyes on me, and I swallow. He leans toward me and his breath tickles my skin, sending a tingling sensation all through my body that settles deep in my stomach. “Do you want to go somewhere less noisy?” That voice I’ve adored since the first time I heard it now whispers in my ear. It’s almost too much to take.
I turn my head toward him, a mistake: Kang is still leaning over me, so his face is now just inches from mine, a hungry look in his eyes. I take a step back and feel my cheeks begin to burn. Kang offers me his hand and I take it, enjoying the sensation of this simple, yet intimate contact. I follow him through the crowd to the kitchen. Someone has brought a thermos of hot chocolate and Kang fills a cup, checks that it isn’t spiked, and hands it to me before pouring one for himself. He then guides me upstairs. I’m reminded of so many movies where couples leave a party to find a place where they can have privacy, but I know Kang isn’t that kind of guy. Besides, that’s for people whobothwant to be more than friends.
We walk down many hallways—this place is like some kind of labyrinth—before we finally stop in front of a pair of double doors and Kang drops my hand to open them. I’m hit by the chilly night air as I step outside. It’s a spacious balcony with decorative lights coiled like snakes around the white railing. The view over the backyard is beautiful, with the whole town framed in the distance. Tall trees sway gently in the breeze. Kang walks to the railing, resting his hand on it as he takes in the scenery with his back to me. I bring my cup to my lips and feel the heat coming from it as I inhale the sweet aroma of hot chocolate.
“Sorry about the game,” I say, wanting to break the silence.
“It’s okay… it wasn’t meant to be. Besides, there’s other things to look forward to.”
“Oh, yeah, like what?”
“It’s going to snow soon,” Kang says, turning to look at me over his shoulder.
“You’re crazy, it’s not even winter yet.”
“I have a feeling.”
I smile. “Of course you do.”
Our eyes meet and we hold the gaze for a moment. I am acutely aware of the fact that we’re alone. I try to calm myself. This is not the first time we’ve been alone; it’s perfectly normal to be alone with a friend.
