Page 98 of Ten Rules for Faking It
Everly pinched Stacey’s arm.
Stacey jumped, laughing. “Ouch. Come on. You think I don’t see that? Or the way he’s crazy about you?”
“I don’t want complications.” Now, Everly focused on her own invisible thread. She didn’t want to feel vulnerable, capable of being hurt again. She had a feeling that she hadn’t known real hurt yet because she’d never felt anything like this before. If it was this…bigbefore they started, it might kill her if they did get together and things ended.
“Life is full of them, Everly.” Stacey sat up.
“Sure. But sometimes you can choose which ones you let in.”
“You just told me to go for it.”
“I’m not you. Chris isn’t the one.”
“You sure?”
Everly nodded.
Stacey tipped her head to one side and held out a hand. “Let me see it.”
Resistance was pointless, so even though her cheeks went hot, Everly got up and grabbed her journal off the cabinet by the door. She flipped it open to the page she’d finished before Stacey arrived.
“Oh my.” Stacey stared at the list Everly had already memorized in an effort to stay strong and choose Owen.Hmm. I should make that into a shirt.
Reasons It Can’t Be Chris:
He’s my boss.
He’s becoming my friend—don’t want to lose that for something that might not last.
Sometimes I’m not even sure he’s into me.
He gives me butterflies. Even when we’re doing something mundane. That can’t be good for me even if it’s a happy kind of nervous.
He’s too observant.
I can’t come out of my shell with someone who won’t push me to do so.
He says he likes me, but he’s helping me find a guy.
He knows too much. Hello, condom piñata.
He’s been married. This shouldn’t matter, but it does. I want someone who will take this step only once. Forever.
I can’t shake the feeling there’s something he’s not saying.
Stacey looked up. “Ev.”
She shrugged. “They’re all good reasons.”
“Are they? You say I’m the brave one, the risk taker, but Ev, you’re amazing. You’ve done this whole contest thing with grace and dignity. People are turning to you for understanding. For hope.”
She scoffed. “That was one person.”
Stacey scooted closer. “That yourespondedto. There are way more DMs than that, and I know you were reading through them. The fact that you found the courage to respond, to recognize that you could help someone else, is huge.” Stacey took a deep breath, probably to keep from getting too fired up. It made Everly smile to know her friend was so willing to see the good.
Stacey nudged Everly’s shoulder. “We’re going to do the new segment. It’s going to help others. You did that. You didn’t just come out of your shell, you broke it down. Smashed it to pieces.”
Everly wanted to disregard the praise, but those were things she felt proud of. “I don’t want the highs and lows. I just want a middle-of-the-road, make-me-content, no-surprises, steady kind of love.”
