Page 72 of Ne'er Duke Well
“What’s wrong? Is it your mother? Has she made further demands of you? Oh, Lyddie—”
“It’s not me,” Lydia said. “I’m not here about myself.”
Selina blinked. “Oh. I’m glad. What’s wrong, then?”
Lydia looked down at her lap. She shifted the large netted reticule that she’d been carrying, then lifted the flap. She withdrew from its depths a book bound in bright emerald green.
Selina felt her heart thump hard against her chest. She tried to fix her face into an expression of casual interest. “A book?”
“Yes,” Lydia said. “A Belvoir’s book, as you know perfectly well.”
“Have there been new rumors about Nicholas?” The tensionthat had simmered inside her these last two days knotted tight beneath her breastbone. “Is that why you’re here?”
“No. At least, not that I’ve heard of. But you, Selina—you are a member of Belvoir’s, are you not?”
“You know I am not. I’ve a membership with the Royal Colonnade.” She did. The Royal Colonnade Library was her primary competitor.
“Indeed. But we’ve talked about the Venus catalog, have we not?”
“Yes, of course. Most intriguing.”
Lydia’s blue eyes held her gaze. “And you have never considered becoming a member yourself? That strikes me as… not at all like you, Selina.”
Selina felt hot and cold at once. “I never felt the need.”
Lydia tossed the green-bound book down onto the smooth surface of the table between them. “Hang it, Selina, I know it is you!”
She could not even try to deny it. Not to Lydia, who was the cleverest woman of her acquaintance, who knew everything.
It had always only been a matter of time.
“How?” It came out a whisper.
“For heaven’s sake, Selina, I used my head. It was not so very hard to figure out, not after I saw how upset you were at the dressmaker’s shop two days ago. I asked myself why Belvoir’s would have been connected to the Duke of Rowland in the first place—goodness knows that his political projects are not the same as the ones promoted by the Venus catalog.” The blue of Lydia’s eyes was dark with agitation. “He owns it, doesn’t he? The Belvoir’s property.”
“No,” Selina said hoarsely. “Will does.”
Lydia’s lips compressed. “Of course. Ofcourse. He has beenout of the country for years now, so they must have attributed the running of the library to Nicholas instead. But as soon as I thought about it for more than a moment, I knew it could not be Nicholas. You, Selina.Yourun Belvoir’s.Youstarted the Venus catalog.”
“I did.” She gritted her teeth, then forced herself to continue. “I do. After Ivy Price and the revelation of her pregnancy. After I learned about the lords and their mistresses and their wives. I was so tired of feeling like I had no control over my life. So I… I took control. Will bought Belvoir’s for me. I ran it.”
Lydia’s eyes had gone bright and wet, and for a moment Selina thought she was furious. And then she realized Lydia washurt, and the knot of anguish inside her tightened further.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Lydia asked. “Didn’t you trust me? Did you really think I would not keep your secret?”
“I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me. I didn’t want you to hate me.”
“Did you truly think Iwould?”
“No. I—I don’t know. I was afraid, Lyd! I couldn’t tell anyone but Will.”
“And yourhusband?”
“He knows,” Selina said miserably. “I told him before we wed.”
“There’s that, at least.”
Her brain didn’t seem to be working properly. She could see the grain of the oak table before her, a twisting pattern of dark and light. She pressed her hand against it, her fingertips flattening against the table’s wooden lines.
