Page 119 of Wilde's End
Hudson’s eyes snap open. “Yeah?”
“If you want to.”
“So, so much.” He points beside the bed. “Lube is in there.”
I reach for the drawer, pulling out lube and a condom that I drop onto the bed beside us, and then I hesitate before looking back at him. “I’ve never done it before. So be gentle, okay?”
The way he looks at me makes me worried he might try to talk me out of it or say something sweet or give me more than I’m ready for, but it only takes a moment for that to pass, and then Hudson tucks his hands back behind his head.
“You’re in control here.” He thrusts his hips obscenely. “It’s ready when you are.”
He’s not lying. His cock is hard and flushed red, still shiny at the tip from my spit. Having him in my mouth feels so right, and I can only hope it’s the same when I ride him.
I cover my fingers with lube, then lean in and kiss him again while I soften my hole. There’s nothing like a good jerk-off in the shower while I ride my fingers, so I’m assuming this will be a thousand times better. To be stretched around him, to know that I’m making him feel good, to bring us both to release in the closest way possible, I want that. Fucking desperately.
I swallow my grunt as I slip a finger inside.
“Tell me what you’re doing,” he murmurs against my lips.
I ignore the request. I’m not sure I could give voice to these thoughts if I wanted to.
His lips curl upward against mine. “Let me guess … you’re fingering that sexy hole?”
Lust curls into my gut, and it would be easy enough to say yes, but I can’t bring myself to. He skims his cock against mine again, sending a rush of nerves to my balls, which loosens me enough to add a second finger.
“How many have you got in there?” he asks. “One? Two?You’ve got such thick fingers, I’m almost jealous that I’m not the one taking them.”
I can’t play along with this game, not when words are my weakness and he’s turning me on too badly to think, but I can give him something. “Two.”
“Two …” His lips brush mine. “Bet you could take three. Bet three would get your hole nice and loose to sink my cock into. I could almost blow, thinking about how warm and snug you’ll feel.”
The arm I’m leaning my weight on shakes with the desire sinking deep in my gut, and even if I’m not ready yet, I try a third finger. I take it slow, letting myself adjust around it, the lube making it easier but not at all easy.
“Hey …” Hudson whispers. “It’s okay. You’ve got it. Just focus on me and breathe.”
“I am breathing.”
He actually laughs at me. “Breathebetter, then. Relax. I know that’s a hard thing for you to understand, but it really does make it so much easier.”
I’m glaring at him out of instinct, but it only pulls his smile wider. And when he looks at me like that, it’s hard to even pretend to be mad.
I relax.
The three fingers sink to my knuckles.
“Fine. Maybe you know what you’re talking about.”
“Pro cock rider. Don’t worry, I’ll teach you everything you need to know.”
My lips meet his softly, because with him, I’m not worried at all. At least not about sex. What comes next beyond the sex is completely unknown, but I refuse to get ahead of myself. I’ve only just been able to admit that I don’t hate the man, so it’s going to take me some time.
But looking down at him while he gazes up at me, hatred is the last thing on my mind.
Hudson’s making me feel again. Like he’s released a wind-up car, tension snapping and propelling us toward this moment.
“You good?” he asks.
“I’m ready.”
