Page 124 of A Taste of Torment
Then, I’ll deal with my shattered heart.
Did he love her?
I shake my head. Nope, not thinking about that.
I force myself to my feet and march over to the table. The work comes easy, my hands moving without much effort. I know what I’m doing and only need to focus enough to distract me from my spiraling thoughts.
Against my will, images flash through my mind.Jarron kissing her the way he kissed me.
I swirl the red liquid of my stunning potion in the cauldron. There are still flecks of silver settling on the top layer. Not ready yet.
His hopeful stare boring into her as they dance. Her beautiful blue eyes, blond hair framing her round face and rosy cheeks.She was so beautiful. Why wouldn’t he have wanted her? Why wouldn’t he have chosen her over me?
I move to the next cauldron, thick and silvery. Invisibility is ready.
Was it her that he was actually missing all those years? When I showed up here, was she the reason he chased after me? Was it her he was seeking information on?
Swallowing a lump in my throat, I grab a set of empty vials. I pour the liquid into three separate vials with trembling fingers, sniffing back tears.
I stack several of the ingredients I am finished with on the shelf, mind still spinning. Dammit, this is what I’m trying to avoid. These thoughts are killing me.
I picture the moment I told Jarron that Liz was dead. The despair in his eyes. The ice creeping up the walls. His fierce determination to help me find the killer.
I will welcome their death.
My hands clench into fists.I press them against my forehead so tightly that pain builds in my mind.
Dammit. How am I supposed to keep doing this?
It was Bea; she put those thoughts in my mind.
I don’t even know if it’s true, but damn did she find the chink in my armor. She waited until the right moment. She waited until I was truly vulnerable, truly hopeful that Jarron and I could have something real.
That’s when she dropped the bomb she’d been holding on to.
And it was such a convenient coincidence it happened right when my journal went missing from her room. Just moments before I’d be confronted about the notes in said journal.
I slam my fists against the table and knock over one of my potions.
She did this. It was her.
Maybe I can still smooth things out with Jarron. Maybe he’ll still help me.
Now that I’ve had time to really think about it, I don’t believe he hurt Liz. I could tell him honestly and wholeheartedly that I don’t suspect him. I don’t.
But part of me really does believe what Bea told me. He wanted Liz.
I’m only a second choice.
And if that’s true, there is no future for him and me. My heart cracks again, but this time, it makes room for the rage.
I don’t know who killed my sister. Not yet. But I know who is deserving of vengeance all the same.
What else are you betting on?
You.
I stow away my few good potions in my bag, putting my three vials of nullifier in the small pouch at the top for easy access. Two vials of invisibility in the front next to the blood-clotter and floating potions I made in class. Then, I march out of the room and head back to the one place I should stay far, far away from.
