Page 75 of Devour
No, this cannot be a blessing, no matter how it is wrapped.
This is a curse. I must never forget that.
34
Lina
One week. I’ve been in this place for one week, and somehow things are… normal? Not terrible. I find myself forgetting the worst parts. I find myself enjoying conversation with Helena and relaxing in the pool.
I still think of Astella often. Does she think I’m being tortured? Does she think I’m already dead?
Somehow, it feels like a betrayal to feel good here.
It is not good here. But it feels that way sometimes.
I dress on my own this morning to save time. My hair is more luscious than it’s ever been, and each day I receive more and more compliments on it. The coils bounce in my hand. My dress today is dark blue, with long sleeves and a hem down to the floor. Helena brought me a whole different set of dresses to accommodate my Drak’s request for less exposed skin. I didn’t have a say.
While I find the new dresses less pretty than the others, and more conservative than the other Drahkita, I don’t mind being covered. I am not the only one who dislikes leers from men.
It is strange that my own Drak doesn’t look at me that way either.
Not that I want him to. I just don’t understand my place here without it. What exactly does he want with me?
My Dread leaves me alone, for the most part. He is respected—or at least feared. Other Drahkita bow their heads when he enters the room. I have not been taught to do so for others, so I don’t know what that means.
I’ve heard he is from an important bloodline but has previously refused leadership. I don’t know how the hierarchy works. Does his legacy mean more respect than others even if he doesn’t act on it? Or did something change?
Others in the community were shocked to hear that he fought the other warrior for me.
I only see him some nights at dinner. He or Helena walk me back to the room and leave me alone until morning.
Dressed and ready, I stand awkwardly in the small room, and I think of Astella.
It has been a full week. Where is she now? I pray to any god who will hear to keep her safe. Reunite us.
I think of my reading. The silver seer freezing, and never finishing. She’s said three words. Words I’m not supposed to take too seriously because she never finished the reading. Chaos, reconciliation and violence. Were they all part of the reading? Were none of them?
I can’t help but consider the possibility that it means Astella is here.
Maybe my reconciliation will be outside of these walls. I’ll escape and find her again.
I’ve seen little of the underground city. Though I’ve tried to learn as much as possible, we are sequestered to one small portion of the mountain. The pool or the sanctuary are the most central locations I’ve been to.
If Astella were brought here, where would she be taken? Would I ever even see her? Is she here already, being tormentedby a Drak or in the pits or being worked to the bone in the kitchens?
I rub my face with my hands. The idea of her being out in the world all alone is terrible, but being here is somehow worse.
Restlessness gets the better of me and I rush for the door. I am surprised to find it opens with ease. I blink at the open hall in front of me.
My heart pounds.
Right now is not the time to explore, unfortunately, because as I look to my right, I see a tan skirt bouncing toward me.
“Drahkita!” Helena says, scampering to meet met in the hall. “You did not wait for me!” She grips my forearms tightly as I let the door to my dwelling shut.
“I knew you’d be along. I figured I’d meet you.” I give her a sweet, innocent smile.
She looks over my shoulder and then over hers.
