Page 31 of Guilty Minds
“Really? Really, Justin?” Freya yells at me as soon as that little piece of trash walks out the door.
It’s easier to call her that—otherwise, there's a real danger of her becoming something else in my eyes, and that’s precisely why I’ve been avoiding her for the past couple of weeks. That moment at the diner… it knocked me off balance, planting weird thoughts in my head. Dirty thoughts. Dangerous thoughts. I have to keep my distance. I have to. For my own sake. Otherwise, I might end up doing something that would hurt a lot of people, one very dear to me in particular, all for the pursuit of following my dick. Because clearly, that’s all it is: my dick talking. She is like that damn forbidden fruit that I can never have. The one I shouldn’t even desire. Nothing more than the mystery of the untouchable.
Every time I close my eyes, I see her plush lips, her little tongue peeking out to wet them. A golden ring in the middle of her lower lip, and the urgency to know how it will—dammit,would—feel under my own lips. Every damn time since that evening at the diner.
Freya's voice thunders around the small space, almost as loud as Alex's. He must be rubbing off on her. She storms up to me, her brown hair flying behind her—that’s how fast she’s moving. “Justin!”
“What?” I blink innocently and take a sip of my coffee.
“You know what, you big, stupid jerk!” She jabs her little finger between my pecs, as if it can hurt me. “Why are you being like this?”
“Like what?” I raise my brows, aware I’m playing with fire.
She digs her fingernail deeper, and I can almost feel it. Almost.
“Youknowwhat, Justin Attleborough. Stop being an asshole to Kayla,” she hisses, full mother bear mode activated.
All my humor evaporates in an instant. "She deserves it, Freya." I lean closer to her face. "She isn't as good as you think she is." And I'd be wise to remind myself of that as well.
“Really? What could she have done that would justify you treating her so badly, Justin? What?” I can tell Freya’s desperate to know the whole story. Kayla probably didn’t tell her everything. Of course, she wouldn’t.
“Ask her.” It’s my turn to hiss. I know Alex won’t appreciate me talking to Freya like that, but he knows my feelings on this.
“Do you think I haven’t? She doesn’t know the reason.” Here comes the proof. Freya sounds calmer now, like she can sense my own distress and understands that only one of us can be high-strung at a time.
“And you believe her?” I almost laugh.
“I do,” she claims with certainty, finding my gaze and holding it. “She doesn’t know, Justin.” A moment of doubt creeps up on me. The first one I’ve had since that night. It’s gone as quickly as it came. Of course, she wouldn’t tell Freya, her only friend who doesn’t know who she is—she doesn’t want to lose her. Ask the whole town, and they’ll tell you: she’s just like her mother and sister—a whore, a liar, a life-destroyer. “Tell me what happened.”
I’m considering it for a second. Freya is Alex’s girlfriend.Live-ingirlfriend, and neither of us have had one ofthosebefore. It’s a huge step for him; she means a lot to him. For fuck’s sake, he finally checked himself into a mental health facility because he wanted to be well for her. She brought my best friend back from the dark depths of his damaged mind when we all thought he was lost forever. And yet Alex hasn’t shared the secret and my shame with her. My respect for my friend grows even more. “It’s not entirely my secret to tell, Freya.” And then I add quietly, almost whispering, “I wish I could tell you, but I can’t. I made a promise not to.”
“To whom, Justin?” she murmurs like she’s beginning to understand the gravity of this.
“To someone very important to me,” I whisper and pull back. “Be careful with Kayla. I have no idea how Alex can stand her being around you, knowing how treacherous she really is and how she likes to run her mouth.” I start walking away, but Freya grabs my hand.
“Whatever you think Kayla did, she didn’t,” she swears stubbornly.
“You don’t know her,” I snap back, my temper beginning to boil over.
“You’re wrong.” She shakes her head. “Idoknow her. In a short period of time, I’ve learned more about her than you have in the lifetime you’ve known her.” Her face is hard with concentration, like she’s desperately holding back something she wants to say.
“Why are you so set on trusting her? You’ve known her for what? A few months?” I’m growing angry with her blind trust in that evil little spawn, and I’m growing even angrier at myself for always noticing how good her ass looks in those black leather pants. Those fucking pants became the bane of my existence the second she started wearing them all the damn time.Allthe time. In the winter, her ass was covered by that long, ugly jacket she thinks is stylish, but now, since the weather has become nicer, she constantly has less and less clothes on. I’d prefer her in a potato sack, her body completely covered. And today, she waltzed in here wearingthat? Does she think it’s okay to walk around, tempting people left and right?
“Yes, Justin, a few short months. But I’ve seen a lot of shit in my life,been througha lot of shit in my life, and I like to think I have a pretty good radar for good people versus shitty people. And she isgoodpeople." Her face is flushed, her hands balled into tiny fists.
“Suit yourself,” I tell her finally, giving up. “Don’t tell me later I didn’t warn you.”
“That won’t be necessary.” Her eyes throw daggers at me, and I throw them right back. She should be running away from Kayla, yet she’s embraced her with arms wide open. Where is Alex in this? He knows what she’s done and that she can’t be trusted, yet she’s still allowed in this house. Is he so pussy-whipped that he closes his eyes to everything if Freya says so? I’ll never be that person. Never.
My head turns toward the door as I catch the sound of Alex’s old truck’s engine.Thank fuck, he’s here—I’m not fit to babysit his girlfriend today.
The door bursts open, and the big mass of my best friend storms in. He assesses the surroundings, and I give him a few moments to adjust. His PTSD is bad, and even though it became better with Freya in his life and his new therapy, he still suffers from it. Another thing in my life I feel guilty for. If I’d just have stuck with him, maybe…
Alex takes three big strides to Freya before proceeding to eat her face.
"That's my cue to leave," I say loud enough for them to hear but not loud enough to interrupt. I’ll let them have their moment.
ChapterTen
