Page 14 of Scarred Mountain Man
I love this man. I’ve been trying to find reasons why this doesn’t make sense: the speed of it all, the fact I barely know him, but none of them can counter this feeling I’ve bubbling up inside me.
Now the question is: will he ever love me back?
Chapter 9 - Oliver
Snuggling against this woman has pushed all the bad away. In the early hours of the morning, rain started pouring again but none of the usual panic came, her warmth enveloped me and protected me from everything else. She's magic and I'm deeply in love with her. I can see us together, living like this. Last night, after she made me come undone with her hands in a way I've never done before, I knew I'd never be the same. Using a towel, I made sure I cleaned everything off her and her clothes. I kissed her again and again, not knowing how to say with words what was passing through me. I couldn't really. How could I tell her I love her this much already? So after she took a shower I didn't let her go, letting myself in her bed, snuggling against her, denying any request of penetrative sex. The last thing I want is to go too fast for her. If she's been wary of men's bodies all her life, getting me off seemed like enough for one night.
My nose is against her hair, I can't help but inhale deeply. I take the opportunity, while she's sleeping, to inhale her sweet scent, so there’s no chance of her discovering I’m a lunatic. But she doesn't give me much time because a few minutes later, she gets up, trying to not move much so as not to wake me.
Instead of letting her know I'm awake, I watch her as she heads towards the door, her ass still giving me an urge to spank it. I'm obsessed. I want to spend the rest of my days with this woman by my side.
An unfamiliar ringtone echoes through the cabin. She asked me to charge her phone yesterday with the generator, so it must be hers.
I get up and head into the living room.
“Oh, the Almond Mountains are amazing! This is exactly what I needed. I think I already know what my next collection will be.”
Someone on the other side must say something funny because she bursts out laughing.
"The next exhibition? You're mad! I still have a lot of work to do."
"Oh, I'll let you know. You know I'm not exhibiting anywhere else."
Reality hits me.
What the hell am I doing? Did I really think for a moment I deserved her? Someone like her? Someone as pure as her? Someone who sees the good in the world even though she's seen it first hand how bad it is?
She needs someone who's as bright as her. Someone charming, someone who'd go to her exhibits and show everyone how great she is, who'd show her the world is not bad. Someone not full of scars on his ugly face, who'd be comfortable surrounded by all those people. Someone who doesn't have nightmares every time it rains, who's broken.
Someone that's not me.
I take a step back when she turns to me, her grin still taking most of her face.
"Morning! The gallery I work with is checking in. She's been very kind to me."
Her smile falters when she sees my expression. I don’t say a word, but my face must give me away.
"So, we're done, huh?"
The fierceness in her voice guts me. She’s so young, she shouldn’t be this perceptive. But she is. She reads me instantly, without hesitation, and it kills me to know she’s suffered enough to recognize it that fast. And now I’m the one hurting her. All I want is to make it right. To make her understand I need to protect her.
She doesn't give me time to say anything else before she storms out the door.
Chapter 10 - Miranda
It only takes me ten steps before the tears start to fall. I'm so mad at him I could kill him. Who does he think he is? Just like that… he’s done with me.
After last night... I thought... I thought it was different, I thought we had shared something. Clearly not. I know better than to trust people. Ever since I can remember, I've been taught not to trust anyone and yet, I trusted this man. I trusted this man so much I was ready to uproot my life. Not that we discussed any of it but my mind was already bursting with plans of a future that's just been shattered by the way he looked at me.
Like everyone else, he told me I'm not worth it. I'm not worth the trouble. He might not have said it with words but there's no need for them when you've heard them all your life.
I pick up a brush and a new canvas as soon as I get to my rented cabin and get to work. Art has always been an escape and today’s no different. I feel feverish, something I don't recognize taking over me, the painting getting darker with each layer, each stroke feeding into my despair.
I've known this man for five minutes. Why did I let him sink into my skin like this? It's like he penetrated my defenses without me noticing. I don't remember ever feeling like this.Maybe only when I was a kid and didn't know hearts could break as easily as glass. I should know better by now.
I'm in this trance for what feels like hours until a knock interrupts me. I don't want to deal with him.
I open the door. "What?" I bark out.
