Page 81 of Rock Out Together
I did too, but it was nice knowing he was being responsible too. And, even though I was on the pill now, I didn’t think I needed to announce it, because I didn’t want that to be an excuse to avoid a condom. I wanted every possible defense against pregnancy. My parents’ idea of my life being ruined would be going to college in Colorado, but I knew there were much bigger things that could make my life more difficult.
Jason’s lips touched mine as soft as a feather at first, and I realized I was taut from head to toe. It wasn’t just because I was about to do something completely foreign or even that losing my virginity might be painful. It was because I was in a strange place with Jason’s parents not too far away. I asked, “Is your door locked?”
“Yeah.”
I’d hoped knowing the answer to that question would have helped me relax, but it didn’t. I was anxious—not because it was Jason but because I had no idea what to expect.
As he kissed me again, he somehow noticed that I was trembling. “You okay, Al?”
“Yes. Just a little nervous.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
His question alone—knowing he cared enough about me to take his time—helped immensely. “Just kiss me,” I said,searching his beautiful blue eyes, hoping the desire in them would distract me from various emotions.
“Gladly.” When our lips met this time, it was different, almost as if Jason had become someone else—and the confidence and strength I felt in him helped my muscles let go of some of the tension they held, reminding me that, yes, I really did want to do this. I’d never experienced these emotions for another boy before, and my entire life had been so focused on my future that I’d almost forgotten to enjoy the present.
Finally, though, Jason was helping me to do just that.
As our tongues intertwined, I held onto the back of his t-shirt as if it were keeping me upright—but Jason had other ideas. Without a word, he guided me to the bed but, as if he sensed my brain wanting to overrule the proceedings, he continued kissing me andjustkissing.
It wasn’t long before my heart and loins wanted so much more, and I ran my fingers up underneath his t-shirt to touch his naked flesh. I heard a soft growl form in his throat, signaling to me just how much he liked what I was doing. Soon, I was cupping his pecs and he, perhaps wanting to move things along, pulled the shirt up over his head before tossing it to the floor.
Then he reciprocated. Just like in his car earlier, he slid his hand up the front of my shirt and began fingering the lace on my bra. My nipples hardened just from the proximity and warmth of his hand and I actually wanted him to keep going.
My nerves had been overtaken by desire.
Soon, we were both pulling my tank top over my head and he began kissing my neck as his fingers worked on the clasp on the back of my bra. It wasn’t long before he got it undone and slowly peeled it off my body as if opening a present, wanting to savor the moment. Unable to take his eyes off my breasts, seeing them for the first time, he said, “You are so beautiful.” I felt like I could no longer speak. “No, I take it back. You’reperfect.”
His intense gaze threatened to move me into nervous territory again, so I pushed my lips into his while trailing my hands up his back. Why were they still shaking? As I lost myself in his kiss again, my body seemed to light up. My nerves began to hum and tingle in anticipation and my panties felt wet, almost like I’d peed in them—but I knew it was a response to him. It had happened once or twice before when we’d engaged in heavy kissing…and I understood why.
My body wanted him. Badly.
And tonight I would be giving it what it wanted.
My heart and soul wanted this too. The only thing that had held me back all this time was the voice in my head, one that I was starting to question. Was it actually my own or was it my parents echoing inside my brain pan?
In order to relax, I had to focus on Jason, so I ran my hands up his chest. It was firm and smooth and touching him helped me feel grounded. He ran his fingers over my nipples, making them even harder, and it ramped up my desire. Suddenly, I wanted to feel him as if he were a part of me, as if we could touch each other all over all at once.
So I did something he’d encouraged me to do recently—Itouched his hardened dick through his jeans. I couldn’t tell much from it, only that it was as rigid as steel, and I imagined it had to be uncomfortable in that tight space.
Moving on instinct, I began to unzip his jeans. Jason asked, “Are you ready?
“Yes.”
I had his jeans down and started to move my hand inside so I could touch his dick for the first time, but as I began to run my hand along the cotton fabric of his underwear, he said, “Fuck, Al—that feels amazing. But I’m gonna lose my load if you don’t stop.” Pursing my lips, I tried not to smile, but I was so inexperienced. Was it even something to smile about? “Just give me a sec.”
I didn’t think I’d ever seen anyone finish undressing so quickly. Off came his shoes, socks, jeans, and underwear in a flash in front of my eyes—and I couldn’t help but gaze upon his erection, wondering how that would fit inside me.
A woman’s body is built to have a baby. Of course, you can handle that—no matter what it looks like.
When assuring myself that his manhood was smaller than a baby didn’t quell my anxiety, I told myself his dick was like a larger, thicker tampon. It would be fine.
The way my heart thudded in my chest could have been anticipation—but I would have been lying to myself if I’d said there was no fear mixed in.
Opening a drawer on his nightstand, he pulled out a box of condoms. And it wasn’t a small one—it was pretty big. I tried not to let that bother me as I noticed it wasn’t completely full when he took out a packet.
But as he unwrapped the individual condom, he grinned. “I’ve been practicing. I think I’ve gotten pretty good at this.”
