Page 10 of Save Me
The words come out of my mouth a little over-eager, a little too happy. Which is how I’ve lived my life since that day. I always appear to be a little too okay with everything, when some days I’m barely getting by. That’s my reality though, and I don’t know any other way to live.
“I have to run to the ladies’ room real quick, but you’ll find some big bowls in that cabinet,” she points to one over on the other side of the kitchen.
“Thanks.” I turn off the burner before walking over to where she’s pointed.
Opening up the cabinet, I see that I’m a little short, but I go up on my tiptoes anyway, stretching my body as far out as I can. Irritated that I can’t grasp what I’m reaching for, I make a noise in my throat, trying again, adding a little jump to my movement.
“Not that this isn’t cute as hell,” I hear a deep voice at my back, “but if you tell me which one you want, I’d be glad to get it for you.”
Gunner is behind me, his voice deep and breathy in my ear. I can feel his heat against my back, all the way down to my legs. He’s not touching me, but it’s almost as if I feel a caresswhere I haven’t felt one in a really long time. My body responds—which it hasn’t done in years. There’s a tightening at my core, my nipples harden and punch against the dress I’m wearing, gooseflesh appears on my arms. I lose my footing as my feet make contact with the ground.
When I pitch forward, his strong arm encircles my waist, holding me tightly, bringing me flush with him. The strong muscles press against the softness of my body, and God, I’ve missed this—missed a hard body holding me closely at the end of a long day, the press of one against mine as we rock against one another. I gasp because the feeling of him wrapped around me turns me on in such a way I thought was dormant in my body. His legs bracket mine, and I tilt my head forward, allowing him a place to put his. My arms go up against the cabinet, bracing, giving myself over to this wave of arousal.
“Are you okay?”
God, that deep voice. I’d love to hear it in my ear as he’s plunging deep inside me. I have no doubt the two of us would be electric together, if the way he’s made me feel by just wrapping his arms around my waist is any indication. It’s hard to push words out from between my dry lips. “Yeah, I’m fine,” I manage to whisper.
His breathing is deep, rushed as he leans his forehead against the back of mine. He moves the hair from my neck, and that’s when I feel the slightest brush of his lips against my bare skin. I grip the sides of the cabinet, willfully not allowing myself to reach around and touch him. It takes everything I have not to melt against him, when really all I want is for him to lift the skirt of my dress up and fuck me right here.
Which is scary because I haven’t had those feelings ever in my life. Not even with my husband. It’s a blur in my mind. Is it because I’ve been so long without sex and love in my life, or is itbecause the love I had for my husband was the stupid love of a young girl who didn’t realize bad things happen to everyone?
That thought clears the fog from my mind, takes away the dreamlike quality of what’s happening here. It gives me the strength to clear my throat, put some strength in it. I straighten my back, put my feet more firmly on the floor. “I need that one up there.”
I know immediately when Gunner realizes my demeanor has changed, but he doesn’t completely detach us from one another. He gets all up in my personal space as he leans in to get the bowl I need. Part of me hates him for that; the other part is glad he won’t let me ignore the heat of the space between us.
“Here you go.”
I turn in his arms so that we’re facing one another.
“Thank you.” I refuse to meet his eyes, to let him see how much he affected me.
But that’s something about Gunner I’m going to have to learn. He doesn’t let me hide easily. His hand comes beneath my chin, lifting it up, forcing my eyes to meet his. There I see the naked attraction he has, and damn if I can’t hide my own.
“You’re welcome,” his voice is still deep. “Sorry if I got too personal.”
I’m not sorry, and I want him to know, but I can’t force myself to push the words past the tightness in my throat and chest. “It’s okay.”
“Is it?” His eyes bore into mine. “I don’t wanna fuck this up, Amy.”
I don’t wanna fuck this up either, but I can’t be as honest as him just yet. My hand reaches up, cupping his cheek in a gesture that’s been reserved for Rosa the last few years. “You won’t, Gunner. If anybody’s gonna fuck it up? Dollars to doughnuts it’ll be me.”
Right then, Emma comes into the kitchen, and we separate quickly. But one thing doesn’t go away, and that’s the feeling of his body against mine. It’s ignited a fire, one I want to throw gas on and let it blaze. Dormant desires have been awakened, and I’m not sure I can ignore them any longer.
The scariest thing? I don’t think I want to ignore them.
CHAPTER SEVEN
GUNNER
Parking my truck in my parents’ driveway, I sigh. I just got off shift and all I want to do is go home and take a nap, but it’s Sunday dinner with the family. With the entire family, or at least the ones who decided to come. I’m one of the last; I can tell because I have to park at the very end of the damn driveway.
It’s not even a hike, but fuck, I’m tired as hell. Last night at the station was crazy.
As I get closer to the house, I hear kids in the backyard squealing and laughing. While I love that they’re having fun, they are loud as hell. Letting myself in, I announce my presence.
“Mom, I’m home.”
I’m the youngest, and because of that, I’m always mobbed when I come home by my mother. I was the last one to move out, and I’m her baby, not to mention I’m the only one who decided to take a public servant job that could lead to me not coming home one night. I’m prepared for the small woman who means the world to me.
