Page 128 of Make Me Trust Again
“Dad’s here,”Kyle says, his voice coming out strained.
“John?” Mom’s brows furrow. “But what is he?—”
She turns around, and I know the exact moment she spots him. Her lips part for a moment, eyes widening. I watch as realization dawns on her, and she presses her lips into a small frown, clearly unhappy.
“He just left,”Kyle whispers, his voice small as he looks up at me. I can see his mind working, trying to put together what just happened. See the sadness shining in his blue eyes as he connects the dots, but still forces out the words.“Why is David with him?”
I curse inwardly. A part of me wishes I can go after John and strangle him for putting this expression on Kyle’s face, but my son comes first. He will always come first. And he deserves an answer. An answer his father should have given him, but he ran away like the fucking coward he is.
“Is Dad Mrs. Donovan’s new boyfriend?”
Kyle’s question snaps me out of my thoughts to find his brows furrowed in concentration.
“Did Dad tell you something?”
Kyle shakes his head.“David said in school that his mom brings a lot of boys home.”
Seriously, these kids.
Crouching down so we’re at the same level, I look Kyle in the eyes.You know that your dad and I divorced, right?
Kyle nods silently.That’s why we live in separate houses.
Exactly. Well, I can’t be certain, but I think Dad and Mrs. Donovan are friends. And since David is her son, he’s with them.
Why didn’t he at least say hi? He saw us.
Because he’s a sorry excuse of a human who doesn’t deserve you. Who never deserved you. I wish I can say it, but I bite my tongue. I’m angry at John for how he’s treating Kyle, but I don’t want my anger to impact their potential relationship. It’s a fine line to walk.
I don’t know, Ky.
He likes David. He smiled at him. He never smiles at me.
If hearts could break, mine would shatter at the utter sadness reflected on his face. Kyle lowers his gaze, his throat bobbing. Slowly, I slip my finger under his chin and lift his head so I can look at him.
Your father is a troubled man, Kyle.
He probably likes him more because he can hear. He’s normal, not like me.
Dammit, John.
Listen to me, Ky. There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing. You hear me? You’re a beautiful and special boy, and if he can’t see it, it’s his loss, okay? I love you. Just the way you are.
Kyle presses his lips together stubbornly.You have to say that; you’re my mom.
I don’t have to do anything. I’m saying it because it’s true. You’re the best thing that happened to me, and I love you.
That uncertainty is still reflected on his face as he echoes the words back to me:I love you, too, Mom.
His arms slip around my shoulders, squeezing tightly. I return his embrace, holding on for dear life. Turning around, I press my mouth against his temple. He’s growing so fast, and with me crouched down like this, he’s as tall as me. Soon, he’llthink he’s too big for affection, so I intend to cherish every second I get.
Over his shoulder, I find my mother observing us silently. I’m surprised she hasn’t said anything by this point; then again, she had just seen firsthand what John can be like.
I rub my palm up and down Kyle’s back until he pulls away, rubbing at his face with the back of his hand.
Can we go home?
We still have school supplies to grab. Ready to go?
