Page 166 of Make Me Trust Again
“How can you be fine? I just had you pinned down to your own bed, for fuck’s sake!” He yells, and I jerk back, stunned by the sound. Chase never yells; he’s always quiet and levelheaded. Nothing like John, and yet, for a split second…
He doesn’t miss my reaction, his face twisting in disgust. “This was a mistake.”
Chase turns his back on me, grabbing his pants and shoving his feet into them, as his words still echo in my head.
My heart skips into overdrive as I watch him struggle to put the jeans on.
Wait… He’s leaving?
Fear slams into me. The realization that if I let him walk out of that door, nothing will ever be the same again.
I’ll lose him.
I can see it clearly.
He’s slipping between my fingers.
Pushing from the bed, I wrap my arms around his middle, plastering my front to his back. “Don’t leave.”
Chase’s body goes rigid in my arms, but I don’t let go. I press my forehead against his back, squeezing him tightly. “Please? Don’t go.”
“Ihurtyou, Rose,” he spits out, and I can hear shame and guilt lacing his voice.
I shake my head. “You didn’t hurt?—”
His hands land on mine, and he tugs them apart, turning in my arms. “I left bruises on you!”
My gaze darts to my wrist, the faint red marks that are still visible on my skin from where he was holding onto me earlier.
“I hurt you,” he repeats, his voice sounding almost like he’s tortured. “I should never have agreed to stay here.”
“Chase, don’t do that,” I plead, tears burning my eyes. He’s going to do it. I can see it in the determined look on his face. He’s going to leave, and that will be the end. “It hurts more knowing that you’re leaving me.”
This can’t be how it ends.
“I’m leaving because I love you, dammit.”
I suck in a sharp breath as I just stare at him, unsure if I heard him correctly.
Did he just say what I think he said?
Chase rakes his fingers through his hair before letting them fall by his sides. “I can’t bear the thought of hurting you any more than I did because I will do it again. I always end up causing pain to the people around me. I always end up hurting the people I love.” He points at the bed, the muscles in his neck visible from how hard he’s grinding his teeth. “This wasn’t even the worst of it. I could have done so much worse.Have doneso much worse. If you only knew, you’d be running the other way. The things I’m capable of doing. And just the thought of putting you through it. Of putting Kyle through this… I have to leave. It’s for the best.”
The wild, unabashed look in his eyes should scare me; it does, a little bit, if I’m being completely honest with myself, and yet… Uncurling my fingers, I let go of his hand. There is a flash of pain, a moment of resignation, before he places that impassive mask on his face.
I grip his cheeks, holding him in place, his wide eyes staring into mine. “Not to me. You might have hurt others, you might even be capable of doing it again, but I don’t doubt for a second that you’d ever hurt me. Not willingly.”
“Rose…”
His voice is pained, my name sounding like a prayer and a curse. He closes his eyes, his forehead pressing against mine ashe lets out a long breath. I skim my fingers over the scruff on his cheeks, inhaling his scent.
He’s fine.
Leaning in slowly, so I don’t startle him, I press my lips against his in a gentle kiss. “I trust you.”
“You shouldn’t.”
“But, I do. I trust you, Chase. I trust you with me. I trust you with my son. I trust that you won’t hurt either of us. I trust you because I love you.”
