Page 17 of Egotistical Jerk
A strange, unwanted lump made its way up my throat, I had to swallow several times before it went back down again.
"So, what did you see yesterday?"
Her smile was back. Her eyes were big and wide while she told me how they'd come across a baboon and a lion cub the previous morning. According to her, the game ranger who'd been with them assumed a lioness had hidden her cub before she went out for a hunt the night before. As luck, or misfortune, would have it, a troop of baboons happened upon the little thing while they were out foraging for food the next morning.
"Wow! And you're sure she was grooming him and not simply tasting?"
The laugh that sounded as if it came straight from the pit of my mom's stomach filtered through the line and settled inside my chest. I realized at that moment just how much I missed my family.
I didn't do the friends thing—save for Simon—it seemed like a lot of unnecessary effort to me. Girlfriends were too clingy. Too needy. I didn't want to keep explaining to someone why I went to the hospital at 3:30 some mornings or why I wanted to stay way past the end of my shift.
"Sebastian?" I blinked a few times until my mom's worried face came into focus. "Are you sure you're all right?" she asked when I only stared.
"I'm just tired. It's been a long day."
I could tell she didn't believe me, but thank heavens, she let it go. "Okay, I won't keep you."
"Thanks for showing me the sunrise."
Mom tipped her head, her eyes and her smile saying the words before they left her mouth. "Go get some rest, okay? Love you."
"Tell dad I said hi. Love you too."
Long after the screen had gone dead, I was still sitting in the same spot. My mind furiously trying to work out a million different things at once.
Why did I feel a pang of jealousy whenever I saw Simon and his family?
Why did being alone suddenly bother me when I'd craved it almost my entire life?
And finally, why oh why was Mia Phillips so firmly stuck in my thoughts that I couldn't remove her even if I tried?
Chapter 9
MIA
Holding on to the railing, I took a deep, steadying breath. Raw nerves and guilt had the butterflies in my tummy doing air flips. But I promised myself I wasn't going to chicken out… again.
After I pulled more air to my lungs, I dragged my feet up the steps and then lifted my hand to knock. Before my knuckles could connect with the hard wood, the door flew open. The woman standing before me might as well have reached inside my chest and squeezed her hand around my heart.
I swear, it flatlined right before it started jumping about at an unnaturally fast pace. How was it even possible to feel physical pain from just looking at someone? But then again, Aunt Vera wasn't just anyone. She was my father's twin.
The resemblance was so striking, I had to close my eyes for a beat. Slowly counting backward from ten, I tried to center myself, to find a sense of calm amidst the chaos inside me.
"Mia."
My name was nothing more than a prayer on her lips.
With my lids still firmly pressed together, I willed the lump in my throat to go back down. I could do this. Iwoulddo this.
Shame lined my stomach when I thought of all the times I'd avoided her on purpose. Made up stories as to why I couldn't come for dinner. Or pressed the red button whenever I saw her name flashing on my phone's screen. I loved my aunt Vera with everything in me, but most times, being near her was like a form of torture.
She looked like my dad—well, she would have if her shoulder-length hair was cropped short and her lashes were less feminine. She sounded like him too, especially when she laughed.
"Come here." The words had barely left her mouth before her arms wrapped around me and tugged me close to her chest. "I'm so happy you're here."
I couldn't speak, too busy trying to get a grip on the fifty different emotions crawling their way to the surface. Sniffling, I nodded into her chest and hoped she understood.
Me too.
