Page 48 of An Inconvenient Marriage
Yet again, I felt vulnerable and exposed. I wanted him to get out of the way so I could grab my dress and cover myself up. I wanted to run and hide.
Until he spoke.
“Go to bed, Natalie.” He sucked in a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Go to bed before we both do something we’ll regret.”
15
Zach
Whatinthenameof all things holy was wrong with me?
That question had been running around my mind on a loop for the better part of the night. At first it was because I couldn’t believe that I’d gone that far with Natalie, and then it was because I couldn’t believe I’d stopped.
I’d spend a lot of time on that last one. She was right there, and she tasted better than the sweetest wine, and yet… I’d stopped.
A few moments after I’d left her standing there, I’d told myself I’d come to my senses just in time.
It was a lie, of course.
In reality, I wanted nothing more than to take everything from her. To claim her so thoroughly, she’d never look at another man again. And that right there was my problem. Or at least part of it.
The other part, the bigger part, was Natalie herself.
I knew I couldn’t in good sense assume how a person with a certain reputation should react, but I figured a woman with her supposedexperiencewould be a little more assertive. Not that I was complaining.
Natalie had driven me out of my damn mind before I’d even laid a single finger on her. And when I’d finally tasted her, all hopes of ever being a sane person vanished. One taste, one small taste, and I’d turned into an addict. A derelict junkie who craved another hit while the needle was still sticking out of my arm.
And instead of taking advantage of that, Natalie seemed to stumble to find her footing. I knew she wanted more, her body begged for it. But for whatever reason, she couldn’t or wouldn’t voice it.
There were far too many unknowns here, and I didn’t like it. Nor did I care for the sudden burst ofsomethingshe lit up inside me. Or how I’d taken care of my needs and yet still felt completely unsatisfied.
So again, what in the name of all things holy was wrong with me?
I couldn’t answer that, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to as long as Natalie was around. Unfortunately, there was the inconvenience of her being my wife for the next six months. Kind of hard to escape someone when you’re supposed to be inseparable and in love.
But I could at least buy myself some time.
Grabbing my watch from the nightstand, I walked to the window and fixed my gaze on the city below. People were already up and about, hustling to their jobs or simply exploring the city. I smiled. This was where I wanted to be.
Not Catalonia specifically, but here in my home country. My heart longed for it. But it also longed for something else, I realized with a shock. It wasn’t the country itself that called to me, it was the memories.
Spain was the last place I’d felt true happiness.
Everything after that was black and tainted. And one man stood at the center of it all.
Gritting my teeth, I turned away from the window. Revenge was finally within my grasp, and I’d better start focusing on that instead of all the ways I wanted to make Natalie scream.
With a determined nod, I fastened the thick silver strap around my wrist. When I was done, I grabbed my jacket and shrugged into it before heading into the living area. It would have been easier to just order breakfast, but for once I was taking the coward’s way out because I didn’t want to face Natalie.
This woman had an uncanny way of crossing my wires and twisting my wants into something I didn’t recognize. And if I was going to get some sense of normalcy back, I needed to spend as little time with her as possible.
It seemed easy enough in my head, but I hadn’t counted on her already being awake or looking gorgeous in jeans and a plain white blouse. What the actual hell? How could something so simple be so utterly stunning?
Maybe because of the woman wearing it.
And it was stupid thoughts like that that just proved yet again why I needed to get away from her.
Natalie had been facing the glass doors when I entered, but she quickly turned around when she heard me.
