Page 81 of Broken Roads
Sebastian exhales slowly, still looking out at the city. "I've rehearsed this conversation a thousand times over the years. Had it all planned out." A bitter laugh escapes him. "Now I can't remember a damn word of it."
"Try starting with why you left without saying goodbye," I suggest, unable to keep the edge from my voice. "Or why you never came back until now."
He nods, accepting the challenge. "I left because I was drowning." The words come out gruff. "Every day on that ranch felt like trying to breathe underwater." He drums his fingers against the railing. "You were born for that life, Brad. It was in your blood from the start. The way you could just... know things. What a horse was thinking. When a storm was coming. How to fix anything with baling wire and determination."
I say nothing, just watch the sun glint off his expensive watch as his hands move.
"But me? I was always the square peg." His voice drops lower. "Do you know how it feels to try so hard at something and still be shit at it? To watch your little brother excel effortlessly while you're just... failing? Every day?"
"So you ran." It’s the same accusation I hurled at him two days ago, but quieter now.
"I escaped," he corrects. "To something I could be good at. Something that made sense to me." He finally turns to face me fully. "I didn't plan to leave without saying goodbye. But that night, I packed my bag and looked at your door across the hall, and I just... couldn't. Couldn't face you. Couldn't bear to see the disappointment in your eyes when I told you I was choosing something else over the ranch. Over our family."
The honesty in his voice chips away at the armor I've built around this wound. "You left me with everything." The words scrape my throat. "Dad was getting older. The ranch was struggling. And suddenly it was all on me." I turn to look at him, needing him to understand. "Do you have any idea what that felt like? To wake up and find that note? To have to tell Dad his golden boy had ditched us in the middle of the night?"
Sebastian flinches. "Dad always understood why I had to go."
"Yeah, well, he didn't have much choice, did he? One son gone, the other one better not fuck off too." The bitterness rises in me like bile. "You got to chase your dreams while I buried mine."
His eyebrows lift. "You had dreams besides the ranch?"
The genuine surprise in his voice makes me laugh. The sound is harsh even to my own ears. "Of course I did. Engineering. Had big dreams to go to Montana State." I shake my head. "But someone had to stay. Someone had to be the responsible one."
"Fuck," Sebastian whispers. "I didn't know."
"How could you? You never asked." I turn back to the view, suddenly exhausted. "Never called, never visited except that one time when Dad had surgery, and even then you were gone before he woke up."
Sebastian is quiet for a long moment. "I wanted to come back," he finally says. "So many times. But the longer I stayed away, the harder it got. And then there was the guilt."
"Guilt?"
"For leaving you with everything. For taking the easy way out."
A laugh bursts out of me. "You think becoming a doctor was the easy way out?"
"Compared to what you faced? Yes." His voice is dead serious. "Med school was brutal, but it was the path I chose. You didn't choose to be saddled with the ranch alone. That's on me."
The admission hangs between us, more honest than anything he's said so far. I study his face, looking for the arrogant brother I've built up in my mind over the years. Instead, I find a man who looks as tired as I feel, carrying his own set of regrets.
"I don't hate the ranch," I finally tell him. "Or the life I built there. I just resented doing it alone."
"And I resented being the failure," Sebastian adds quietly. "The son who couldn't measure up to Walker standards."
We fall silent again, but it's different now. Less hostile.
"I want to build something now," Sebastian murmurs. "Between us. I know it's twenty years too late, but—"
The balcony door swings open, cutting him off. A young woman in scrubs steps out, clutching a folder to her chest. Her eyes widen when she sees us.
"Dr. Walker," she says, practically vibrating with nervous energy. "I'm so sorry to interrupt, but the results came back from your father's tests, and Dr. Patel said you wanted to see them right away."
Sebastian straightens immediately, the vulnerable brother disappearing behind the mask of the competent doctor. "Thank you, Lisa. I'll take those."
She hands over the folder and retreats quickly, casting a curious glance at me before the door closes behind her.
Sebastian flips the folder open, scanning the pages with practiced efficiency. I watch his face, searching for clues, but his expression gives nothing away.
"Well?" I demand when I can't stand the silence any longer. "What does it say?"
