Page 40 of Falling for Red
I step to my front door, and there it is, a to-go coffee waiting on the front stoop. I look around. No Jake. I pick it up and sip. Vanilla latte, like yesterday. But it tastes even better today.
The surprise. The foreseeing of my needs. He’s spoiling me. Campaigning to be my boyfriend. He’s embodying “if he wanted to he would.” Smiling, I take another sip.
Claire Moore
You’re sweet.
Jake Schmidt
Time for you to sit on the couch and read.
I smirk and curl up on the couch, tucking a blanket around me. I try to focus on my book, but my mind keeps drifting to Jake.
The way he looks at me. The way he listens. The way he makes me feel like I am something worth waiting for.
I sip my coffee, letting my thoughts drift to a mental list:
Pro:There’s no one else. I’m only interested in him.
Pro:He’s thoughtful, dependable, and easy to be around.
Con:My life is complicated. Being with me isn’t just being with me. It means understanding my schedule, my responsibilities, my past.
Con:Can I handle adding someone else’s needs into my daily life?
The truth is, I’m not just afraid of things moving fast. I’m afraid of losing myself again. It’s more than my ex. It’s my lack of parents too. I’ve experienced so much loss and don’t know if I can handle any more.
I toss the blanket aside. I’m too restless to sit still. If I can’t quiet my mind, I can at least tire out my body. I cast a bodyweight workout onto the TV and push through squats, lunges, and burpees. It’s been a while since I’ve done this, but I missed it.
Maybe I should start working out a couple of times a week again. I know it’s healthy and what I should be doing, but I also don’t want to be this soft anymore, even if Jake likes it.
I laugh to myself as I walk to the bathroom, sweaty and satisfied. Jake is the first guy who hasn’t made little comments about how I could look better. My ex was always saying something—“Are you sure you want to eat that?”Meanwhile, Jake keeps feeding me. I can’t wait to see what he’s making for dinner.
I turn the handle on the tub and gather candles. It’s been forever since I’ve had a long bath. I chuckle as I light a few.I probably shouldn’t burn the place down.But I keep lighting them anyway.
Jake in his fire suit … now that’s some roleplay we’ll to have to explore.
I step into the steaming water, the scent of lavender wrapping around me from the bath bomb. My muscles relax, but my mind is replaying the way Jake touched me yesterday. The way he kissed my thighs.
That was hot.
Without overthinking it, I grab my phone and snap a photo of my legs with bubbles strategically placed. Just enough to tease, but not too scandalous.
