Page 104 of Sharing Shadow Secrets
“Tell me when.”
The excitement is all over her face, and I love it. But then her expression shifts. “After you decide if you want a boyfriend or not. I want us to all be on the same page about what we are to each other.”
Taylor is the exact type of person I should be with. She thinks things through. Being impulsive is not her default setting.
“I have an appointment tomorrow with my therapist to share what I have been up to. But … I think I want to explore that side of me more, and with him.”
“You owe him your ass,” she teases.
“Do I?” I flirt, leaning down to kiss her.
Taylor sees the whole me. She wants me to be me, my whole self.
“I love you,” I breathe between kisses. “Also, what do you think about a double date with Dani and Declan on Wednesday?”
“Sounds fun,” she says, tugging my shirt up.
“I thought you can’t take any more?”
I lift her onto the bathroom counter, settling between her legs.
“I don’t want to leave just yet.”
“We won’t leave until you’re ready.”
“For Wednesday, what do you think about cooking together at your place? I want to see it, and it will be casual and simple.”
“If you insist.”
“I do.”
“I love you, Taylor.”
“I love you.”
I take a deep breath. “Before we start exploring more with Kyle … do you see us together … forever?”
Taylor nods. “But don’t propose to me for at least a year. And I don’t want a huge ring. Maybe just a band.”
I press a kiss to her lips thinking about November 2nd of next year. I’ve never looked forward to something more. I know in my soul that Taylor is my person. And exploring doesn’t make me question that. It only solidifies it. She accepts and supportsmy whole self. And same with her. I’ve never felt this solid with another person, this safe and secure.
“Let’s take the helicopter,” Taylor says, beaming. “After I spend some more time with you in bed.”
“Deal … and how about you go on a date with Kyle tomorrow or Tuesday? And then I go out with him on Thursday or Friday?”
“And we can debrief at brunch after yoga on Saturday.”
I smile, pressing my forehead to hers. “I love you, girlfriend.”
“I love you, boyfriend number one.” She laughs, and I’ve never been more content.
77
Thursday, November 6th
Waiting for Brandon outside the Asian-American fusion spot, I’m standing on this bustling North Halsted sidewalk. I spot a few couples holding hands—men with men, women with women. When I first moved to Chicago, this neighborhood was called Boystown, but thankfully that name’s changed. It was never just for the boys. It’s for all of us.
It hits me just how fast your life can change. On Tuesday, I was on a playful, casual date with Taylor. Now, I’m about to go on a date with her boyfriend. Who could be my boyfriend soon if this all continues to go well. She also could become my girlfriend.The three of us …This scenario still feels surreal.
