Page 99 of Sharing Shadow Secrets
I turn back to the sink, grab another glass and fill it. Opening cupboards, I look for a tray and set the glasses on it and step to the pantry. I grab a mix of prepackaged snacks and catch myself smiling.
Ireallylike her. Not just the sex. I like the way Taylor tilted her chin when she said what she wanted. The way she laughed when she got nervous. The way she looked between us like she couldn’t believe it was real.
I just hope tonight didn’t ruin my chance to know her beyond this.
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“Baby, are you okay?” I whisper, wiping the tears from her cheeks. Some are already soaked into my chest. I hold her tighter, wanting her to feel safe in my arms.
“Yeah … that was … intense.”
“Very,” I say, rubbing her back in slow, steady circles. “Can I let go for a second to take the condom off?”
She nods but murmurs, “Sorry.”
I pause. “Why are you apologizing?”
“Sorry you didn’t come. Sorry I ruined the vibe.”
My heart sinks, and I gently guide her to look at me. “Taylor. This was aboutyou.That’s what we agreed to. You didn’t ruin anything. Youdidexactly what you were supposed to—you listened to yourself. And I’m proud of you.”
She sniffles and shifts onto her back. “I want to get under the covers.”
I hover over her for a moment, brushing a kiss against her forehead. Then I pull back the blanket and let her crawl in, tucking it around her shoulders. She looks small and flushed and gorgeous, even with racoon eyes.
“Can I go to the bathroom,” I ask quietly, “or do you want me to stay?”
A soft smile returns to her face, that familiar mix of sass and sweetness. “You have my permission to pee,” she says, a little laugh escaping.
I grin, squeezing her thigh through the blanket. “I love you.”
Then I head into the bathroom and close the door.
As soon as it clicks shut, I exhale. My body’s coming down from the high.
I take the condom off, toss it in the trash, and lean against the sink for a second, just breathing. My chest is tight in a different way now.
When she saidstop, my whole system froze, assuming we’d gone too far. That she might have kept going just to avoid disappointing us. And that part is fucking me up.
Because I’ve been there—wanting to say no and not saying it.
She used her voice. And we honored it.
I glance at my reflection. My hair is a mess, and I look like I’ve been through something. I have. So have she and Kyle.
Pissing, my mind drifts to how I can spoil her. Tomorrow, I’ll make it up to her. Butler mode: activated. No standing, no lifting, no stress. Just blankets, snacks, and anything she wants on demand.
I flush, wash my hands, and think about how we started tonight. The bath. The Eiffel Tower. Tonight was still a fucking hot night. I grab a washcloth and run it under the warm water. I poke through her makeup bag and find makeup remover. Both in hand, I reenter the bedroom and find her half asleep.
“Let’s take your makeup off before you knock out,” I encourage.
She hums, thatI just want to sleep, don’t bother mekind of noise.
I sit beside her, and she props herself up, taking the cloth and makeup remover from my hands. Watching her pump the liquid into the cloth, I decide to ask, “Did we go too far?”
“No,” she says with a smile, then wipes her eye. “Your dicks are just huge, and it hurt,” she casually says, wiping the other eye.
I reach for the cloth because she can’t see where the makeup remains on her face. She smiles, staring into my eyes then shuts her lids. I wipe under each eye, and the smile stays on her face.
