Page 114 of The Cerulean Sister
"I am here."
"I know, but I miss—" I crane my neck to meet his visor, touching the side of his head like I want to slip inside."
"It is . . . difficult for me too."
I hold him for a few more moments, tucked farther into the kitchen area and out of the view of the others. It feels so good to have him pressed against me, his strong arms holding me tightly and the smell of him reminding me I am safe when I am with him.
"Are you hungry?" he whispers at the sound of my stomach rumbling against his.
"Yes."
We make our way the short distance to the dining room. Calliape and August sit on either side of Selene at the head of the table, her arms resting on top. The chairs are metal and in varying sizes and styles, and the table is covered in a butter-colored cloth and set with a few items of meat and bread.
I sit in an available spot, and 99 stands across from me, leaning against the wall.
"Hello, Selene. I apologize for being rude. Thank you for coming."
"I came because Calliape asked me."
It's unclear how much I have offended her or if she is just being her normal, off-putting self.
"Either way."
"I was very sorry to hear about your sister," she says.
I smile tightly at her, reaching across to pour myself some water, and notice her lean in.
"I can smell the incense on you, Ferren. It is my hope you are not finding yourself lost in there."
She wants me to react, I think, to see how I respond and give her any kind of clue of how my mind has held up while assimilating back into the Estate.
"Thank you for your concern. But all we need is your testimony of what is happening in that temple. I know you cannot move around the Estate, but any way you can help is appreciated." The words are easier to say than I thought they would be.
"How far along is she?" Selene asks and places a piece of white meat on her plate with some kind of vegetable.
"I am . . . not sure."
"Here." Selene holds a cupped hand to her belly, floating far in front, elegantly leaning back to exaggerate the size. "Or here?" She holds it closer, the same hand position Leema held hers in this morning.
"The second," I say.
"That's still good news. We have time." August leans in a little, trying to reassure me.
He and Selene both seem to know how far into pregnancy she is, more than the rest of us.
"My eldest sister shows really early. Everyone is different." He glances around the room.
99 pushes off the windowless wall, and I can tell he does not want to say what he is about to announce. "When the fleet arrives, the sole focus will be on the conjunction. Even now with the attacks, it will be hard to shift concentration on any corruption found."
"But the lord general said he would help if we found something," I say.
"That was before, when we were stationed in the birthlands like every other conjunction. It would be best to submit whatever we have before the fleet arrives. Even then, we may not be able to make a move until after the conjunction."
"Well, it sounds like Leema has some time," Calliape says hopefully.
Selene closes her eyes like she is deep in thought. "In times of high stress, children may come early. We still need to be diligent."
My heart sinks.
